Re: please help me editing essay ! i am a newcomer, thanks a lot.
Welcome to Using English.
If this is an assignment that you are supposed to turn in to your teacher, it would not be fair for us to help you. Your teacher needs to see what you can do on your own, and won't know how to help you learn if you turn in a paper without any mistakes.
However, after you turn it in, if your teacher has made comments you don't understand (or don't agree with), then please post your questions about that here and we will help you understand them.
(Is it really the case that factories there can pollute the air, ground, and water, without any responsibility? There are many factories that take great pride in how sustainably they operate, without polluting the air, without contaminating the ground, and only discharging water that has been cleaned so that it matches the local water.)
I'm not a teacher, but I write for a living. Please don't ask me about 2nd conditionals, but I'm a safe bet for what reads well in (American) English.