To get back my admission fee

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mpbindoos

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my name is bindya pradeep. i m from kerala. i have to write a letter to withdraw my admission fee from my business school which is currently i joint.. because of financial problem.. i could not study there. they have a rule fees once paid will not be refunded under any circumstances.. but still the admission officer said to me send a letter.. my family condition is so pathetic . so getting back that money is very necessary.. so can you help me to write that letter?
 

5jj

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Welcome to the forum, mpbindoos.:hi:

We like to help when we can, but we are not a letter-writing service. If you write your own letter and post it here: Letter Writing, someone may help you correct it. I have to warn you that not many of us have time for such work, and your request may not receive a response, but it's worth a try.
 

mpbindoos

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Respected sir,
My name is BINDYA PRADEEP . I am from Kerala. i am writing to request that my admission at IBMR business school be withdrawn. i paid my admission fee. but by some financial problems, i could not continue my higher studies. in this suffocating atmosphere, if i get back my admission fee it will be favourable for my family, becuase the condition is so pathetic. so i humbly request you to please consider my letter and show kindness towards me.
yours faithfully
BINDYA PRADEEP
PLEASE HELP ME TO CORRECT THIS LETTER
 
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mpbindoos

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please correct this letter

Respected sir,
My name is BINDYA PRADEEP . I am from Kerala. i am writing to request that my admission at IBMR business school be withdrawn. i paid my admission fee. but by some financial problems, i could not continue my higher studies. in this suffocating atmosphere, if i get back my admission fee it will be favourable for my family, becuase the condition is so pathetic. so i humbly request you to please consider my letter and show kindness towards me.
yours faithfully
BINDYA PRADEEP
PLEASE HELP ME TO CORRECT THIS LETTER
 

5jj

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Please do not post this letter elsewhere with a different username.

In fact, please do not post duplicate threads under any name. Also, please do not register under different names. If you feel that you have a good reason for operating under two usernames, please PM an administrator to see if this is acceptable. If you don't do this, we tend to suspect that you may be a troll.
 

mpbindoos

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it was too necessary time.. and no1 here to help me... then what will i do? i have 1 another option.. just i was waiting 4 sm1s reply..
 

Barb_D

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I'm sorry, but posting at least three times in one hour is a bit excessive -- especially when you realize we are a global forum and many of us are asleep at that time!

And writing "just i was waiting 4 sm1s reply" is all but incomprehensible.

The pronoun "I" is always capitalized.
The first letter of a sentence is always capitalized.
Your name should not be in all capitals - just the first letters of each word.
Change the entire last part to "My family is facing extreme financial hardship so I am requesting that you waive the rule that prohibits returning my deposit. I appreciate your considering this request and would be happy to provide more information if needed."
 
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