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  1. #1
    philomena is offline Newbie
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    verbage on a resume

    I am trying to help my daughter with her resume and just know that some phrases are wrong, this is one..... for example

    Assistant to CEO/President, prepped expense reports, screened calls, and maintained executive calendars.
    Managed office, employee hours, questions, bills and all incoming mail.
    Facilitated and managed weekly progress meetings.
    Provided a high level of customer service responding to inquiries and as senior loan modification processor and file maintenance for all departments.

    How should I help her write this...


  2. #2
    emsr2d2's Avatar
    emsr2d2 is offline Moderator
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    Re: verbage on a resume

    Apart from the fact I don't really like the use of "prepped" instead of "prepared", I'm not sure what's wrong with it. What were you referring to when you said "Some phrases are wrong, this is one for example"?
    Remember - correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing make posts much easier to read.

  3. #3
    SoothingDave is offline VIP Member
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    Re: verbage on a resume

    Well, it's all a bit disorganized and run on for me.

    Her job was as assistant to the CEO, right? That should be by itself on a line. It should have the dates when she served. She shouldn't just start launching into the job duties after naming the job.

    Then, she starts listing more duties as bullet points. That's fine, but include the duties from the first line (where she names the job title) as a first bullet point.

    And this:

    Provided a high level of customer service responding to inquiries and as senior loan modification processor and file maintenance for all departments.
    is just too much. Did she provide customer service as "file maintenance" and as a "loan modification processor"? Two "ands" in the sentence should give a clue that you're running on.

    The parallelism is lost as well. She uses "responding" and "processor" and "maintenance" all linked together.

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