Results 1 to 8 of 8
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Student or Learner
      • Native Language:
      • Chinese
      • Home Country:
      • China
      • Current Location:
      • China

    • Join Date: Nov 2009
    • Posts: 1,049
    • Post Thanks / Like
    #1

    Is the sentence grammatically okay? If not, edit it please

    The patient's clinical manifestation has no indication for surgery , and the ultrasound doesn't show the possible existence of the tumour , so we decide to take conservative treatment.

    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • English Teacher
      • Native Language:
      • English
      • Home Country:
      • United States
      • Current Location:
      • United States

    • Join Date: Jan 2010
    • Posts: 1,696
    • Post Thanks / Like
    #2

    Re: Is the sentence grammatically okay? If not, edit it please

    Quote Originally Posted by NewHopeR View Post
    The patient's clinical manifestation has no indication for surgery , and the ultrasound doesn't show the possible existence of the tumour , so we decide to take conservative treatment.
    If there was no tumor, why did you use "the" tumor? The election as to the type of treatment was made in the past. What is the correct past tense for "decide"? One doesn't "take conservative treatment". Rewrite this part using "upon".

  1. emsr2d2's Avatar
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • English Teacher
      • Native Language:
      • British English
      • Home Country:
      • UK
      • Current Location:
      • UK

    • Join Date: Jul 2009
    • Posts: 25,853
    • Post Thanks / Like
    #3

    Re: Is the sentence grammatically okay? If not, edit it please

    And do not put a space before a comma.
    Remember - correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing make posts much easier to read.

    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Student or Learner
      • Native Language:
      • Chinese
      • Home Country:
      • China
      • Current Location:
      • China

    • Join Date: Nov 2009
    • Posts: 1,049
    • Post Thanks / Like
    #4

    Re: Is the sentence grammatically okay? If not, edit it please

    Quote Originally Posted by Gillnetter View Post
    If there was no tumor, why did you use "the" tumor? The election as to the type of treatment was made in the past. What is the correct past tense for "decide"? One doesn't "take conservative treatment". Rewrite this part using "upon".
    Thank you.

    First attempt of rewriting:

    The patient's clinical manifestation had no indication for surgery, and the ultrasound didn't show the possible existence of tumour, so we decided to take upon conservative treatment.

    Is there a need for further editing?

  2. emsr2d2's Avatar
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • English Teacher
      • Native Language:
      • British English
      • Home Country:
      • UK
      • Current Location:
      • UK

    • Join Date: Jul 2009
    • Posts: 25,853
    • Post Thanks / Like
    #5

    Re: Is the sentence grammatically okay? If not, edit it please

    Quote Originally Posted by NewHopeR View Post
    Thank you.

    First attempt of rewriting:

    The patient's clinical manifestation had no indication for surgery, and the ultrasound didn't show the possible existence of tumour, so we decided to take upon conservative treatment.

    Is there a need for further editing?
    "evidence of a tumo(u)r"
    "We decided upon conservative treatment"

    As Gillnetter said, "take" is unnecessary.
    Remember - correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing make posts much easier to read.

    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Student or Learner
      • Native Language:
      • Chinese
      • Home Country:
      • China
      • Current Location:
      • China

    • Join Date: Nov 2009
    • Posts: 1,049
    • Post Thanks / Like
    #6

    Re: Is the sentence grammatically okay? If not, edit it please

    Quote Originally Posted by emsr2d2 View Post
    "evidence of a tumo(u)r"
    "We decided upon conservative treatment"

    As Gillnetter said, "take" is unnecessary.


    Does "We decided upon conservative treatment" mean "We decided upon conservative treatment (which would be recieved by the patient)"?

  3. emsr2d2's Avatar
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • English Teacher
      • Native Language:
      • British English
      • Home Country:
      • UK
      • Current Location:
      • UK

    • Join Date: Jul 2009
    • Posts: 25,853
    • Post Thanks / Like
    #7

    Re: Is the sentence grammatically okay? If not, edit it please

    Quote Originally Posted by NewHopeR View Post
    Does "We decided upon conservative treatment" mean "We decided upon conservative treatment (which would be recieved by the patient)"?
    It would be rather odd for them to decide upon a treatment plan for anyone other than the patient!
    Remember - correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing make posts much easier to read.

    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Retired English Teacher
      • Native Language:
      • English
      • Home Country:
      • England
      • Current Location:
      • England

    • Join Date: Jun 2010
    • Posts: 16,395
    • Post Thanks / Like
    #8

    Re: Is the sentence grammatically okay? If not, edit it please

    Tip for a better thread title: The patient's clinical manifestation.


    Rover

Similar Threads

  1. Which sentence is grammatically right?
    By JacquelineSchneider in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 16-May-2012, 08:59
  2. [Grammar] Is this sentence grammatically correct?
    By Super Sonic in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 23-May-2010, 16:50
  3. [Grammar] Is this sentence grammatically right ?
    By Joe333 in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 21-Mar-2010, 13:48
  4. [Grammar] Is this sentence right grammatically
    By Joe333 in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 03-Feb-2010, 23:52
  5. Is this sentence grammatically ok?
    By Unregistered in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 21-Jun-2007, 03:57

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •