[Essay] Paragraph of a marketing essay

[liamoa]

I'm studying a preparation course for a master program, the paragraph bellow is part of my homework. I have some doubts about the structured so I'd like to get some feedback


"Assessing the effectiveness of internet promotion, sale stands in supermarkets and TV Ad products with the amount required for investment, I would prefer to hire promotion on TV. Despite of the fact that TV promotion does not have neither personal contact with consumer nor available information for them, it eliminates pitfalls such as:To invest in internet publicity expecting people to click on the website or on the advertising banner and expend in training and placing promoters in all supermarket locations in the country."

 

[charliedeut]

I'm studying a preparation course for a master program. The paragraph bel[STRIKE]l[/STRIKE]ow is part of my homework. I have some doubts about the structured so I'd like to get some feedback


"Assessing the effectiveness of internet promotion, sale stands in supermarkets and TV Ad products with the amount required for investment, I would prefer to hire promotion on TV. Despite of the fact that TV promotion does not have neither personal contact with consumer nor available information for them, it eliminates pitfalls such as:To invest in internet publicity expecting people to click on the website or on the advertising banner and expend in training and placing promoters in all supermarket locations in the country."

Hi liamoa, and welcome :hi: to the forum,

As you will realiize as you continue to visit the forum, we do not do people's homework. The teachers/professors want to know what you can do, not what we can.

Once you have been returned the corrected version of the essay, if there is anything you do not undesrtand/agree with, feel free to post it here, and we will be happy to help you.

charliedeut

 

[emsr2d2]

I'm studying a preparation course for a Masters program. The paragraph [STRIKE]bellow[/STRIKE] below is part of my homework. I have some doubts about the [STRIKE]structured[/STRIKE] structure so I'd like to get some feedback.

Please see my amendments to the first part of your post. As charliedeut said, we can't look at a piece of writing until you've submitted it and had it marked by your teacher/tutor. If any of their corrections confuse you, then feel free to ask us to have a look.