Is it okay too many commas in a sentence?

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haha27

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For instance, one of my friends, John majoring in Egyptian at a university could not get a job in Korea because there are a few companies related to Egypt in Korea. However, he could get a good job after he studied English and got a certification about business. In other way, having many skills is helpful for us to get a job.

In the first sentence as you can see, I used two commas. I am wondering if they are okay or not.


 
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TheParser

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***** NOT A TEACHER *****



Hello,


You have written a very nice paragraph. I should, however, make a few changes:

For example, my friend John majored in Arabic, but he was unable to secure employment, for there is not much commerce

between Egypt and South Korea. On the other hand, after he studied English and earned a certificate in business, he

was able to secure a good job. In other words, having a variety of skills ensures success in obtaining employment.
 

Tdol

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It's OK to use a number of commas in a sentence, but too many would be too many.
 
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