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  1. #11
    emsr2d2's Avatar
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    Re: fairness sentences

    Quote Originally Posted by ladyTL View Post
    I don't really get his point. But it seems like we are going to submit it again or more like let him see if we have understand the wrongs. But the grade of the essay won't be change, that's for certain.
    Which parts of your opening paragraph did he say he wanted you to look at again?
    Remember - correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing make posts much easier to read.

  2. #12
    TheParser is offline VIP Member
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    Re: fairness sentences

    ***** NOT A TEACHER *****


    Hello,


    Since you say that you have already submitted your assignment and you have already received an unchangeable mark,

    I think that I am permitted to comment on it.

    I think that you did a great job. May I, however, suggest a few changes?

    What comes to mind when you hear the word "fairness"? The racism during World War II and the cruelty shown to the Jewish people? Or why your mother gets a lower salary than your teacher, even though she works as hard as him? [For perfect English, it should be "as hard as he." I do not know how strict a grammarian your teacher is.] Or whether animal research is right? Fairness is nothing but a concept that arises from humans viewing the world as a perfect place, which it can never be.



    James


    NOTE: A few people still believe that "She works as hard as he" is the English mandated by the rules. Most people today do not follow this rule.
    Last edited by TheParser; 09-Nov-2012 at 15:27. Reason: "Note" added as a result of moderator's comments.

  3. #13
    5jj's Avatar
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    Re: fairness sentences

    Quote Originally Posted by TheParser View Post
    For perfect English, it should be "as hard as he." I do not know how strict a grammarian your teacher is.
    As we have said countless times in this forum, the subject-form he is considered unnatural by some in such constructions as this unless followed by a verb ('does' in this case). 'Him' is acceptable to most native speakers. It is simply not true that 'as hard as he' is perfect English.

  4. #14
    emsr2d2's Avatar
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    Re: fairness sentences

    Before I had realised this might be an assignment, I had typed a corrected paragraph. As long as your mark is unchangeable, then I am happy to show what I wrote. However, I hope you will not submit this to your teacher as your version after you'd thought about it.

    Quote Originally Posted by ladyTL View Post
    What comes up in to your mind when you hear ”fairness”? The racism during the Second World War and how cruellythe human some people treated the Jewish people? Or why your mother gets a lower salary than your male teacher even though she works as hard as him? Or maybe if it is right or wrong to use animals in research? Fairness is nothing but a simple concept that defines all humans' view of a perfect world, a world that is not possibley true.
    Remember - correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing make posts much easier to read.

  5. #15
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    Re: fairness sentences

    One thing I just can't let stand (and you can work with your teacher to correct the other issues) is the phrase "jew people."
    You can say "Jews" or you can say "Jewish people" but you cannot use "jew" (especially with a lower case j) people. It's offensive to use "Jew" as an ejective.
    I'm not a teacher, but I write for a living. Please don't ask me about 2nd conditionals, but I'm a safe bet for what reads well in (American) English.

  6. #16
    TheParser is offline VIP Member
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    Re: fairness sentences

    Quote Originally Posted by 5jj View Post
    It is simply not true that 'as hard as he' is perfect English.
    ***** NOT A TEACHER *****


    I have added a note of clarification to my original post.

    We non-teachers are currently allowed to state our views so long as those views are not total

    rubbish (as another moderator recently labeled one of my opinions).

    I have no doubt whatsoever that a few writers (mostly non-fiction) would not be caught dead

    writing "I am taller than him" or "It is me." The rules are the rules, even though native speakers are

    changing them by their actual speech. But there still a few people (including foreign teachers of

    English) who are resolved to follow those rules.

    I am grateful that we non-teachers are allowed to air our views. Of course, students should accept a

    teacher's word over a non-teacher's. As they become more fluent, they will discover for themselves what

    "perfect" English is.

  7. #17
    5jj's Avatar
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    Re: fairness sentences

    Quote Originally Posted by TheParser View Post
    The rules are the rules, even though native speakers are changing them by their actual speech.
    Remember that rules in English are like scientific laws. They are not things that must be obeyed, but observations of what generally (in language) and always (with scientific laws) happens.
    Of course, students should accept a teacher's word over a non-teacher's.
    I disagree. There are many non-teachers (and many non-native speakers of English) who have a deep understanding of the workings of the English language. We have several who offer valuable advice in this forum. There are also, unfortunately some teachers, including some native speakers, who know less than they ideally should.

  8. #18
    ladyTL is offline Junior Member
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    Re: fairness sentences

    Oh, thank you guys very much for helping me this much. But my question are the wrongs more grammatic wrongs or "construction-wrongs" or what?

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