GilWould anyone be kind enough to check the following paragraph for me? Thanks!
There were lots of differences between the field trip and the classroom-teaching at school. It was my first time to visit the headquarters of LiveABC Magazine Company. How surprising it is to enrich my experience (What you are trying to say here is, "It enriched my experience". If you want to use "surprise", "I was surprised at how it enriched my experience". Even by changing this sentence, there is the question of what experience was enriched.). Mr. Jason Chen, the chief editor, as well as the vice president of LiveABC, explained how they
spendexpend tremendous efforts on the intricate procedures of publishing a magazine and the making of a CD-ROM. Even a common, ordinary CD-ROM that we donít cherish much wants to be something more than it is (Rewrite this sentence. CDs do not want anything, they are not alive and do not have a brain.). Therefore, we should make the most use of the magazines and the CD-ROMs to make our English go advanced (English cannot "go advanced". "Therefore, we should make the best use of magazines and CDs to help us advance in our English). That was really a special experience for us and we learned a valuable lesson (I doubt if you learned a lesson. You may have learned how magazines and CDs are made, but that is not really a lesson. A lesson would be more meaningful. If you went to a prison and saw the conditions there, you may have learned a lesson, not to be a criminal).
- For Teachers