I'm studying for FCE test and and I need someone to correct my writing.

Exercise: You have seen the following advertisement in a young people's magazine.

Ad:
"The young people of today are likely to live longer and be healthier than any other generation. Why do you think that is? Write us an article answering this question".

My writing:


The Healthiest Generation Ever!

Have you ever wondered why do we, young people, are likely to live longer and be healthier? Well, I'm sure you'll agree that scienceís progress is much helpful for extending our lives expectancy.

According to some recent researches, medical technologies have been developing and had advanced a lot on diseases' treatments. On top of that, the young generation has further benefits than the older generations.

In addition to that, we are more aware of our health and lifestyle. We are trying to be fit, practicing more exercises and eat in proper proportions to keep our organism in the best conditions. Nowadays, we also know that the key to be successful in daily life is having a good physical and mental health.

In my opinion, the advancement of medical technology and young people's awarance of health will help them to be much healthier and live longer than any other generation.


Thank you in advance!