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  1. #1
    Olacnog is offline Newbie
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    Default Correct my english, please.

    Thanks in advance! This is a formal letter.

    "I am very interested in attending the International Conference of Alternatives to Animal Experimentation and there are several reasons why. I am a master degreeís student of Evolutionary Developmental Biology. Therefore, there were several occasions in which I was given the opportunity to do animal experimentation.

    However, I always have been interested in animal activism, including the ethics behind animal experimentation, and consequently I refused it on every occasion. I donít think any kind of gain justifies the pain inflicted on a sentient living being and that includes scientific knowledge. Animal experimentation itís a particular area of animal exploration that I am interested in mainly because itís difficult to argue against.

    Most of the people in general see animal exploration as essential to human welfare, which I think is not necessarily true. Therefore, I hope to learn about alternatives to this activity to help me improve my scientific knowledge on the subject.

    As an animal activist, I participate often in manifestations and awareness initiatives, in which animal exploration is somehow involved. I am also one of the founders of a recently created group for animal rights, the University Students for the Animal Cause. As a group, we are trying to collect signatures from university students to put an end to animal experimentation for pedagogic goals on the Faculty of Sciences of the University of Lisbon. We hope that with these signatures we can put an end to this kind of activities. Although we canít end with animal experimentation as a whole, we are optimistic that this small step can bring us closer to that objective. To increase the number of signatures collected, we also organized one talk presentation with ConstanÁa Carvalho, in which she talked about alternatives to animal experimentation for pedagogical purposes.

    In view of all this written above, I am particularly interested in this congress not only to improve my personal knowledge in this area but also to maybe improve the work that we, University Students for Animal Cause, have been developing."

  2. #2
    emsr2d2's Avatar
    emsr2d2 is offline Moderator
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    Default Re: Correct my english, please.

    Quote Originally Posted by Olacnog View Post
    Thanks in advance! This is a formal letter.

    "I am very interested in attending the International Conference of Alternatives to Animal Experimentation and there are several reasons why. I am studying for a Masters degree’s student of in Evolutionary Developmental Biology. Therefore, there were have been several occasions in which where I was given the opportunity to do animal experimentation.

    However, I always have been interested in animal activism, including the ethics behind animal experimentation, and consequently I refused it to take part in those experiments on every occasion. I don’t do not think believe that any kind of gain justifies the pain inflicted on a sentient living being, and that includes scientific knowledge. Animal experimentation it’s is a particular area of animal exploration that I am interested in, mainly because it’s it is difficult to argue against.

    Most of the people in generalMost people (or "people in general") see animal exploration experimentation as essential to human welfare which - I do not think this is not necessarily true. Therefore, I hope to learn about alternatives to this activity experimentation to help me improve my scientific knowledge on the subject.

    As an animal activist, I participate often in manifestations demonstrations and awareness initiatives, in which animal exploration experimentation is somehow involved. I am also one of the founders of a recently created group for animal rights, the University Students for the Animal Cause. As a group, we are trying to collect signatures from university students to put an end to animal experimentation for pedagogic goals on within the Faculty of Sciences of the University of Lisbon. We hope that with these signatures we can put an end to this these kinds of activities. Although we can’t end with animal experimentation as a whole completely, we are optimistic that this small step can bring us closer to that objective. To increase the number of signatures collected, we also organized one talk a presentation with by ConstanÁa Carvalho, in which she talked about alternatives to animal experimentation for pedagogical purposes.

    In view of all this written the above, I am particularly interested in this congress, not only to improve my personal knowledge in this area but also to maybe perhaps improve the work that we, of the University Students for Animal Cause.
    See above for a few corrections. You used "animal exploration" twice. I wasn't sure if you meant "experimentation" or "exploitation". I changed it to "experimentation" both times as that made more sense. Note that we don't use "manifestations" in this way in English (this is a false friend in French, Spanish and Portuguese).

    Note that I have also moved this piece to the Editing and Writing Topics section as it more appropriate there.
    Remember - correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing make posts much easier to read.

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