Results 1 to 3 of 3
  1. #1
    rozalia31 is offline Newbie
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Student or Learner
      • Native Language:
      • Hungarian
      • Home Country:
      • Hungary
      • Current Location:
      • Grenada
    Join Date
    Feb 2013
    Posts
    2
    Post Thanks / Like

    Post can you help me correct this application letter??

    Thanks in advance to everyone!
    Here's the task:
    -Are you intereste in music
    -Do you have any useful experience?
    - Is your level of English good?

    Dear Mr Fortune,

    I have seen your advertisement in a magazine and I am writing to apply for a job in your music store.

    I am 19-year-old student from Netherland and I have just finished school.I have lived in London for three years.I have excellent communication and organisational skills.I am optimistic person.I am hardworking,friendly and having excellent English.
    Last year I worked in a music store but unfortunately it was closed.
    Well,I think I am the suitable person , because I have always interested in music and I play all kind of instruments.
    In addition I have a big music band,and I am the pianist.

    I would be grateful if you would send me further details about this position.

    I would welcome the oppurtunity if i attend an interview.

    Your Faithfully,
    xx

  2. #2
    billmcd is offline Key Member
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • English Teacher
      • Native Language:
      • English
      • Home Country:
      • United States
      • Current Location:
      • United States
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    3,505
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default Re: can you help me correct this application letter??

    Quote Originally Posted by rozalia31 View Post
    Thanks in advance to everyone!
    Here's the task:
    -Are you interested in music
    -Do you have any useful experience?
    - Is your level of English good?

    Dear Mr Fortune,

    I have seen your advertisement in a magazine and I am writing this my application to apply for a job for a position in your music store.

    I am 19-year-old student from the Netherlands and I have just finished school completed my education. (You should specify the level of education.) I have lived been living in London for three years. I have excellent communication and organisational skills. I am an optimistic person.I am hardworking, friendly and I have a good command of excellent English. Last year, I worked in a music store, but unfortunately, it was closed.

    Well,I think I am the suitable person I believe I qualify for this position because I have always had an interest ed in music and I play all kind a variety of instruments.
    In addition, I have a big music band ,and among which I am the pianist.

    I would be grateful if you would send me further details about this position and I would welcome the opportunity if i attend for an interview.

    Yours Faithfully, sincerely,
    xx
    b.
    Last edited by billmcd; 27-Feb-2013 at 15:18. Reason: typos

  3. #3
    rozalia31 is offline Newbie
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Student or Learner
      • Native Language:
      • Hungarian
      • Home Country:
      • Hungary
      • Current Location:
      • Grenada
    Join Date
    Feb 2013
    Posts
    2
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default Re: can you help me correct this application letter??

    Thank you very much! :)

Similar Threads

  1. [Essay] please correct this application letter. thanks.
    By olufunmilayo in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 21-Aug-2012, 22:25
  2. [Cover Letter] Can you help me correct this application letter please?
    By caro44 in forum CVs, Resumes and Applications
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 27-Nov-2011, 08:06
  3. please correct my letter of application
    By amirghh in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 06-Jan-2010, 19:53
  4. Can you correct my letter of application?
    By gx90t in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 30-Jan-2008, 15:41

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •