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  1. #1
    citytech is offline Newbie
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    Exclamation 9th Grade Essay! - Can Someone Please Proofread my Essay?! [Book Theif][900 Words]

    It's 4:33 AM here and I just spent the night making my essay the best it could be.

    I'm in 9th grade and want this essay to be a masterpiece. I have until around 12:30 to hand it in.

    The last line of the introductory paragraph is my thesis.

    This is an essay on the Book Thief.


    Victims of the Time

    The Book Thief, by Mark Zusak, is a novel that portrays the struggles of a young German girl living in Nazi Germany during the Third Reich. This scared German girl, Liesel, fought and battled to survive in a war-torn society –- holding her tongue when there was injustice and learning the ropes of living in fear. Hidden in this girl's basement was a Jew. Not weak, old and frail Jew, but a young, strong and lively "Jewish fist fighter," as he called himself. Perhaps it was their parallel interests, or maybe it was their match of personalities that made the bond between these two so powerful. Whatever the case, this Jew in the basement, Max Vandenburg, gives Liesel’s life purpose, and Liesel, in turn, gave Max's life purpose. Max and Liesel become great friends, are brought together through shared qualities, and give each other the purpose and drive needed survive the horrors of WWII.

    The friendship Liesel and Max had was so strong that even a small, mad and obscure man named Hitler, his mighty army, and the pool of propaganda they produced could not break their relationship. Scared of him at first, Liesel becomes rather curios when Max starts living in the Hubermann household. This curiosity led Liesel to find that Max had a loving spirit in the midst of atrocities. They became friendly enough that Liesel would report to Max, in the cold and empty basement, the weather. “The sky," she said, "is blue today, Max, and there is a big long cloud, and it's stretched out, like a rope. At the end of it, the sun is like a yellow hole.” The two both dreamed breath-taking nightmares, "In their separate rooms, they would dream their nightmares and wake up, one with a scream in drowning sheets, the other with a gasp for air next to a smoking fire." This common relationship with dreams led Max to write The Standover Man, inspiring Liesel to produce a story of her own and possibly even saving her life. As time passed and their relationship grew, and they began to genuinely love each other as if they were born brother and sister.

    A young German girl and a bony Jew, at a glance, don't seem to have much in common. Though this may be, when you peer inside the minds of the two, one's perspective might change. Max and Liesel, while physically opposites, share similar ideologies and interests. Both Max and Liesel have experienced a great deal of suffering and pain in their lifetime. Max's family's fate is unknown after their capture by the Nazis, and Liesel's brother lies dead in the cold ground of Germany on a trip her communist mother took to personally orphan Liesel. This immense emotional pain they share further unites them together and provokes the nightmares they share. Max and Liesel were both political refugees and shared the suffering and pain that came along with being so, but perhaps the thing that makes Max Vandenburg and Liesel Meminger so alike was the fact they were both Word Shakers, or people who wrote words of love and compassion in a time when words were hateful in nature. Words did not come easily, and Liesel and Max had to support each other to carry on through the struggles they faced.

    Especially so in the lives of Max and Liesel, purpose is what drives people to push on in times of struggle and cut through the challenges of life. Born to a mother who abandoned her, sibling to a brother who died on a train next to her, and adopted in a soon-to-be war-torn land, purpose was greatly needed in the life of Liesel. She found this greatly needed purpose in someone who also needed the same drive as she did. When Max was sick and on the verge of death, Liesel was resilient and remained hopeful, giving Max as many as thirteen miscellaneous gifts to help him recover. Recover Max did, due to these gifts that helped him hold onto hope. Max helped Liesel in a more indirect way. Liesel was lost, so to speak, until she met Max. Max gave Liesel something to believe in and something to stand for, as expressed when Liesel shouted, "I hate Hitler!" Screaming this after seeing Max being persecuted by the Nazi Party is evidence that Liesel's beliefs were heavily influences by Max. Together, Liesel and Max inspired each other to survive a life of pain and sorrow

    This novel proves that love and compassion can triumph even the greatest evil. Through selfless acts like sheltering a Jew at the risk of death all for personal honor, giving purpose and drive to a young girl, and eventually saving a life through the gift of words, Max and Liesel make the best of a bad situation. Ultimately, the traits shared by Liesel and Max are the driving force behind each other, and these two become great friends on their quest to survive unjust persecution. The love and compassion the two expressed and genuine good will they had was enough to defy the hate of an entire nation corrupted by the propaganda of Hitler. Max and Liesel weren't victims of Death nor were they victims of corrupted men. Max Vandenburg and Liesel Meminger were victims of the time

    __________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ ______________

    Thank you to those who have taken your precious time to read my essay! You are greatly helping an aspiring writer!

  2. #2
    emsr2d2's Avatar
    emsr2d2 is offline Moderator
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    Default Re: 9th Grade Essay! - Can Someone Please Proofread my Essay?! [Book Theif][900 Words

    It would be entirely inappropriate for us to help you with homework before you hand it in. You have done the best you can. Submit your essay and then wait to get it back with your mark and any corrections. After you get it back, if there are any corrections you don't understand, feel free to come back and ask us to explain them.

    I have closed this thread to make sure that no-one else can inadvertently make amendments to your piece, without realising it is your homework.
    Remember - correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing make posts much easier to read.

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