Where are you teacher Tdol ? I expect some comments from you.
- For Teachers
1.Also is used at the beginning of a sentence to indicate that the sentence continues a thought begun with the previous sentence and adds something to it. It sometimes (but not always) performs a different function in the middle of a sentence. Neither way is more formal than the other. (Did I answer the question?)
I thought it was more formal to use also in the middle of the sentence than in the beginning simply because my professor considered it a mistake that I have committed last semester.
2.What do you think of this one?
The Playboy of the Western World, by John Willington Synge, is a dramatic, classical masterpiece. One of its outstanding characteristics is its unity of structure. Digression or superfluities are non-existent in this play. There is only a single plot that develops without deviating from the major theme. The theme of this play is the change of a man’s character from a weak person to a hero through committing patricide. There is no extra information that mars the unity of the action in the play. In addition to the unity of action, we have the unity of time and place. Although we have the feeling that a long time has passed, the action of the play covers only just twenty- four hours. As far as the unity of action is concerned, the entire action takes place in a shebeen located near the seashore of Mayo.
3.Isn't it plotlines that contribute to plot? Shouldn't it be his relationship with his lover that changes his character?
Yes, I guess, but I am talking now about the structure of the play only. I wanted to emphasize how those erotic scenes are substantial to the plot and not how important their relationship was.
4.What if I add this to the last sentence in the introduction, would it be better although it may not exactly conform to the organization of the essay? The Playboy of the Western World contains several classical elements, such as the unity of time, place, and action, the introduction of the hero, the unraveling of the plot, the reversal of situation, climax, propriety, and comic reversals. (There are some paragraphs that cannot be considered as classical elements .In fact; I suggested that the writer did not follow the classical way in those things, such as diction.)
5.Do you like the font color and size ?Should I change them?
6.I do really appreciate your comments ,teacher .
Loads of love,
Where are you teacher Tdol ? I expect some comments from you.
Classical Elements in The Playboy of the Western World
=> Italicize The Playboy.... It's a title.
Classicism “is an attitude to literature that is guided by admiration of the qualities of formal balance, proportion, decorum, and a restraint attributed to the major works of ancient Greek and Roman literature.”
=> State the name, work and page number of the author who penned "is an attitude...." Quotation marks are used to indicate reported speech.
=> I don't understand the quote. Literature is usually not defined as an 'attitude'. It'd be best if you could after the quote rephrase the quote in your own words for the sake of the reader. We, the readers, have not read what you have, so we rely on you to guide us through.
A classical play is one that holds classical elements in its subject matter or form. The Playboy of the Western World contains several classical elements.
=> It would be benefical if you could provide examples of classical elements in subject matter and form.
=> Drop one of the three 'classical's; drop one of the two 'elements'. Use synonyms.
The Playboy of the Western World, by John Willington Synge, is a dramatic, classical masterpiece.
=> Is it a play? Briefly tell your reader what it is and what it is about. Again, we have not read what you've read, so help us understand.
One of its outstanding characteristics is its unity of structure.
=> For example,....
Digression or superfluities are non-existent in this play.
=> What do those terms mean? Please explain.
Everything in it is linked with the main theme. There is no sub-plot.
=> Briefly explain why no sub-plot is important or not important.
There is only a single plot that develops without deviating from the major theme.
=> What is the single plot that...?
The theme of this play is the change of a man’s character from a weak person to a hero through committing patricide. There is no extra information that mars the unity of the action in the play. Apart from the unity of action,
=> I'm not quite sure I understand unity of action you're trying to express here. Could you explain more?
we have the unity of time and place. Although we have the feeling that a long time has passed, the action of the play covers only “a revolution of the sun “,
=> Who said "a revolution of..."?
just twenty- four hours. As far as the unity of action is concerned, the entire action takes place in a shebeen located near the seashore of Mayo.
=> It'd be helpful to your reader if you defined unity of action in one paragraph and unity of time and place in another paragraph.
Love-scenes are essential to the main theme. A similar theme in the play is the love affair, which develops between the major character, Christy, and the important, female character, Pegeen. The main love-scene between them is one of the most poetic scenes in the play. However, this love-scene does not disrupt the unity of action and does not interfere with the development of the main plot, which is the development of Christy’s character. In fact, the idea of love and marriage is put to support the main action. The love-scenes contribute considerably to Christy’s change of character.
=> Nice paragraph! Well worded and clear. I'd like to see the first part of your essay expressed in the same way. One thing, though, provide examples of why and how love scenes disrupt the unity of action elsewhere in classical works. This is paramount. It provides your reader with comparison.
Just like the classical way, the opening dialogue serves as a good introduction to the hero, Christy. Pegeen is writing a letter that shows her marriage to Shawn is approaching. After Shawn enters the shebeen, the writer reveals to us that Pegeen does not like him. She mocks him saying that “It’s wonder, Shaneen, the Holy Father’d be taking notice of the likes of you …” She maintains that there are only insignificant, coward people in the village, and it seems that Shawn is one of them. At the same time, we learn that Pegeen’s father, Michael, is going to a wake and leaving her alone in the shebeen for the entire night. Shawn refuses to stay with her because he is afraid of Father Reilly. This, in turn, contributes to her resentment of him. He tells Pegeen of “a kind of fellow”, he heard groaning in a ditch. It is clear that Pegeen is welcoming any brave man. Furthermore, the conversation of the characters in the shebeen foreshadows that Michael will hire a pot-boy. Consequently, it prepares us for the coming of the main hero, Christy.
=> Briefly add the significance of hiring 'a pot-boy' and how the consequence of that is 'a good introduction of the hero.' What does 'good' mean here?
The plot begins to unravel more and more; and the foundations for Christy becoming a hero are wonderfully laid.
=> What does 'wonderfully' mean here?
After Michael and his friends enter the shebeen, they are followed by “a kind of fellow”, Christy. Because of Christy’s suspense evoking investigation by Michael, Pegeen, and the others, he reveals that he had killed his father with a loy (a spade).
=> Nice use of brackets to explain terminology the reader is unfamiliar with. I'd like to see that used throughout your essay. It'd help the reader.
Be kind to your reader. :D
The reaction of his listeners is encouraging to him.
=> There are listeners? Please explain. I've missed something here.
Philly says that Christy is not “a common week-day kind of murderer”. Even “the peelers” are afraid of him. Jimmy says that he is capable of facing a devil from hell. Pegeen says that he is both wise and brave. Moreover, she says that he is suitable to be hired by her father as a pot-boy in the shebeen. Then, he is offered the job, and he accepts the offer after being convinced that he will be safe there from the police. The foundations of Christy becoming a hero are laid in this scene where he receives praise from all those around him in the shebeen save Shawn, who criticizes him for committing a murder.
=> Nice! Especially the last part. Well done. :D
Christy’ story of his past life is crucial to the play. Christy has already overcome his fears. Furthermore, his morale is raised by Pegeen, who admires his small feet, his name, and his ability to speak like a poet,”And I’ve heard all times it’s the poets are your like, fine fiery fellows with great rages when their temper is aroused.” Consequently, he tells her about his past, saying that he was insignificant person in his village and no one took notice of him except beasts. This tale of his past life is very important for the play because it makes us notice how the change in his personality (peripeteia: the reversal of the situation) will transpire.
=> Very well put. :D I'd change 'very important' to 'significant because'.
The fight between Widow Queen and Pegeen over Christy is important simply because it contributes to Christy’s realization and recognition of himself. Widow Queen arrives at the shebeen although it is too late at night. She attempts to convince the queer fellow, Christy,
=> Is 'queer' your word or a word from the text? If it's your word, I'd change it. If it's from the text, use quotation marks.
to spend the night at her house. The fight starts between the two women. This clash gives Christy more confidence. At the end of the Act,
=> Which Act? Please state the number.
Christy expresses his satisfaction of the fact that the two women fight over him. Therefore, this new feeling of self-esteem marks an important step in Christy’s transformation. This soliloquy represents the first climax (turning point) in the play.
=> "This" refers to words that are coming next. 1) this new feeling should be that new feeling; moreover, This soliloguy should be rephrased. The reader is expecting to read the 'soliloquy'.
Propriety is a classical characteristic of the hero.
=> Is that sentence a section heading? If not, rephrase it into a statement.
Christ behaves according to his status.
=> JC Christ or Christy?
Act II begins with Christy’s soliloquy that shows that he is satisfied with his job. He finds also that the mirror there shows him to be more handsome than the mirror in his village. After the girls and Widow Queen come to see him, he tells them his tale trying to make it sound as grand as he could. He includes some more details of his story. Susan says that his story is grand and Honor admires his way of telling the story.
=> Who is Susan. The reader just met her. Define who she is and how her opinion is necessary here.
Christy, as an ordinary person, is made more self-assured by the girls’ praise. Afterwards, Pegeen comes and tells him that he is in danger because he is narrating his story to everyone.
=> 'he' and 'his' are ambiguous here. Who is narrating whose story?
Demoralized, he readies himself to leave, but Pegeen says that he will be safe as far as he keeps himself away from everybody and especially the girls. This is the first anti-climax in the play.
Just when Christy is feeling happy and self-assured, something happens to snatch that happiness and self-assurance away from him. Upon seeing his father coming to the shebeen, he hides himself behind the door. Widow Queen tackles the matter by telling Old Mahon wrong information about Christy. This coming back of Old Mahon is essential to the play because it gives a comic relief. If the patricide were actually committed, this would have been a gloomy effect on us. It also introduces a new character, whose speech is so comic.
The arrival of Old Mahon in Act II had been a kind of comic reversal. Act III has two comic reversals like the previous one.
=> Change 'has been' to 'is'. Use the present tense.
At the beginning of Act III, we know from Jimmy and Philly talk that Christy has won a great deal of money and he has been declared a winner in many sports such as, racing, jumping “and the Lord knows what.” Old Mahon returns to the shebeen. He and the others, Jimmy, Philly and Widow Queen, at the shebeen watch the mule race. Christy wins the race adding that to his many victories. Christy, the “lier on walls” and “the talker of folly “in his village, has become the great champion in Mayo village. In fact, it is a great change .This is the second climax in the play. Old Mahon recognizes the champion as his own son, but Widow Queen succeeds, for the second time, in convincing him that he is not his son and that he is raving.
=> Nice explanation of Act III. Now explain why the 2nd climax is an important classical element.
=> The essay starts with promises of expressing classical elements in the play, and yet the reader hears of it here in ACT III. Please be consistent. Tell your reader when and/or where in the play a classical elements is taking place.
Although, according to classicism standards, the writer should use lofty, sophisticated diction, Synge used the language of simple, vulgar people selectively.
=> Very nice insight. Now explain why it's significant.
Christy receives prizes for his victories in the sports and finds himself alone with Pegeen, who feels proud of him. There is a highly rhetorical love-scene between them.
=> If it's 'highly rhetorical' explain why its significant.
Christy now reaches the peak of his achievement in Mayo by getting the promise from Pegeen that she would marry him within fortnight. Michael objects their proposed marriage, but he changes his mind upon seeing that Shawn is a coward and incapable of defending himself. This is also another climax in the play.
=> It's just not any climax. It's rather important. Please explain why by drawing on classical literary structure.
Then, another comic reversal, which has tragic implications, takes place.
=> Excellent use of adjectives. I'd like to see more of that kind of writing in the previous paragraphs.
Old Mahon comes back and begins to beat Christy. Upon seeing that Christy’s father is alive and beating him, Pegeen says that he must quit the place because he has told her lies. The people of the village have also turned against him for the same reason. In order to regain the esteem of Pegeen and the people of the village, he kills his father for the second time. However, they regard him as a criminal and not as a hero. This is another anti-climax in Christy’s career.
=> Good! 'anti-' Great!
The village people tied him up with ropes in order to hand him over to the police. Nevertheless, not having been killed by the second blow, Christ’s father comes back again. Christy is reconciled to his father and agrees to go back to his village on one condition: that he will be the leader from now on. Finally, he makes his speech, which shows that his change from a weak person to a hero is complete. This is the final climax in the play. He departs and leaves Pegeen with a broken heart.
=> Switch the underlined part with the bold part.
Ultimately, the play mostly conforms to classical canons.
=> Ooh. A new term: 'classical canons'. Explain please.
The three unities of time, place, and action are achieved.
=> As the reader, I'm not quite sure I am clear on what was shown to be a unity of time, a unity of place, and a unity of action. Possibly mention those elements more clearly throughout your essay.
The plot is simple and has a beginning, middle, and an end.
=> Why is that important? How does that relate to classical elements? Please conclude with more insight.
The hero is “true to life” and is introduced in a classical way.
=> Explain again how the hero is introduced in a classical way. Remind the reader. We've read a lot so far; we may have forgotten.
Finally, by arousing pity and fear the audience has attained “the purgation of emotions”.
=> Who aroused pity and fear? The author or the actor(s)? Please use the active voice: X's actions aroused pity and fear in Y by..."
Thanks a bunch! :D
Very, very, good! :D
Originally Posted by Casiopea
I would like to thank u for your pregnant feedback .That 's All I can say.
Should I assume then that you're guest, the father--of that piece of writing? :DOriginally Posted by HardRock
I like the idea of 'pregnant feedback'.
It's a term that was used quite often, way back in the 80s. A tad bit out dated now-a-days. :DOriginally Posted by tdol
Originally Posted by tdol
It is a literary term which means fruitful and this is the etymology of this word:
it was even used as an adverb
[f. pregnant a.2 + -ly2.]
In a pregnant manner or state.
1. _Fruitfully' (Johnson 1755).
b. In a form capable of development. rare.
It seems teacher Todl that you were driving at something else , loo. :P :P
It's not a common collocation. We'd probably use a different term. It is used with some words like 'pause', though.