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  1. #1
    liliakhat is offline Newbie
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    Default Please revise my Motivation Letter for Master programme

    This is very important motivation letter for applying MS. It would be scored for vocabulary, grammar, cohesion and coherence as well as for argumentation ))
    So I would be very thankful, if there will be somebody who could give me any advise and correction.

    Dear Sir or Madam,
    I am writing to apply for the main educational Master programme “Polar and Marine Sciences”, starting in September 2013 in Saint-Petersburg State University.

    I have completed my Bachelor Degree in Biology (with specialization in Neuroscience) from Saint-Petersburg State University in 2012. Currently, I am working as a specialist in optical microscopy in Research Resource Centre for Molecular and Cell Technologies of SPbSU. My main task at my work is to operate fluorescent and confocal microscopes and to teach and supervise users interested in this equipment. Due to that I have wide experience in conventional fluorescence, confocal and multiphoton microscopy as well as some experience in lecturing.

    Before University I had finished physico-mathematical lyceum and correspondence school supported by Moscow Institute of Physics and Technology, and that gave me a lot of advantages during my higher education and working. As for the English language proficiency, I have got advanced level and this year I have also attended two extension English courses. I think that these knowledge and skills will be helpful for me in the completion of this Master programme and hopefully they will be applicable for the research work in polar and marine sciences.

    POMOR is one of the most perspective and promising Master programmes of the University according to its announcement and positive references from graduates which I have asked. My main reason for choosing this programme is to get education that would be completely different from other opportunities I could get at the University. At first, POMOR gives a chance to study abroad while being in St. Petersburg by conducting lectures of German scientists and offering one-semester practice in Hamburg University. It is very challenging to study in English and I think POMOR has very serious demands for the students’ working, but this only contributes to graduating more qualified and skillful specialists. So I am sure that POMOR will be a great support for my future career either in science – to find PhD position, or in commercial sphere concerned with ecology and marine mining.

    Not the least reason to apply for this Master programme is its field of study. Although my diploma work was related to neuroscience and my present work is connected with microscopy, I have always dreamt about faraway sea expeditions and field work. And I hope that entering POMOR will help me a lot in finding people who are engaged in organizing and participating in expeditions to join them. Not to mention that POMOR conducts its own polar practice that would be a wonderful experience.

    When I was a bachelor student I saw an announcement of POMOR Master programme on the faculty bulletin board. That time I eagerly wanted to enter it but it was impossible because my education had not finished yet. But this time I can do it. And I am still very interested in education in POMOR and I am confident that my experience and skills would fulfill your requirements.

    Thank you for considering my application.

    Yours faithfully,
    Lilia Khatmullina.

  2. #2
    EnglishFix is offline Member
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    Default Re: Please revise my Motivation Letter for Master programme

    Dear Sir or Madam,

    I am writing to apply for the Master’s programme “Polar and Marine Sciences”, starting in September 2013 at Saint-Petersburg State University.

    I have completed my Bachelor’s Degree in Biology (with a specialization in Neuroscience) from Saint-Petersburg State University in 2012. Currently, I am working as a specialist in optical microscopy at the Research Resource Centre for Molecular and Cell Technologies of SPbSU. My main task at my work is to operate fluorescent and confocal microscopes and to teach and supervise users interested in this equipment. Due to this I have vast experience in conventional fluorescence, confocal and multiphoton microscopy as well as some experience in lecturing.

    Before University, I had finished at the physico-mathematical lyceum and correspondence school supported by the Moscow Institute of Physics and Technology and that gave me a lot of advantages during my higher education and my work. As for English language proficiency, I am at an advanced level and this year I also attended two extension English courses. I think that this knowledge and these skills will be helpful for me in the completion of this Master’s programme and hopefully they will be applicable to research work in polar and marine sciences.

    POMOR is one of the most perspective and promising Master’s programmes of the University according to the positive references from graduates for which I have asked. My main reason for choosing this programme is to receive an education that would be completely different from other opportunities that I could get at the University. First, POMOR gives me a chance to study abroad while being in St. Petersburg by conducting lectures of German scientists and offering a one-semester practice at Hamburg University. It is very challenging to study in English and I think POMOR has very serious demands for its students, but this only contributes to graduating more qualified and skillful specialists. So I am sure that POMOR will be a great foundation for my future career either in science – to find a PhD position, or in the commercial sphere concerned with ecology and marine mining.

    Not the least reason to apply for this Master’s programme is its field of study. Although my diploma work was related to neuroscience and my present work is connected with microscopy, I have always dreamt about faraway sea expeditions and field work. I hope that entering POMOR will help me a lot in finding people who are engaged in organizing and participating in expeditions to join them. Not to mention that POMOR conducts its own polar practice which would be a wonderful experience.

    When I was a bachelor’s student I saw an announcement of POMOR’s Master’s programme on the faculty bulletin board. That time I eagerly wanted to enter it but it was impossible because my education had not finished yet. But this time I can do it. And I am still very interested in education at POMOR and I am confident that my experience and skills would fulfill your requirements.

    Thank you for considering my application.

    Yours faithfully,

    Lilia Khatmullina.

  3. #3
    liliakhat is offline Newbie
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    Default Re: Please revise my Motivation Letter for Master programme

    Thank you very much! Your correction is very useful for me!

    Best regards,
    Lilia

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