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  1. #1
    MaryamAbbasi is offline Newbie
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    Correct me please

    Hi,
    Could you please correct these sentences?
    1- The most valuable thing I've ever had was a 90-meter square apartment that I won in a lottery. (Is it possible to use lottery here? or is the lottery only used for money?)
    2- I had a 3-yaer-old daughter who needed to be looked after 24/7.
    3- one day, I heard about a house lottery taking place in our company.
    4- I registered my name disappointingly cause I could have never imagined that I'd win. (Is the tense correct?)
    5- It took two years until the building of these apartments had finished.
    6- can we say attend the lottery? (e.g. There were four people attending the lottery)

    Thank you in advance
    Mary
    Last edited by MaryamAbbasi; 02-Jul-2013 at 11:17.

  2. #2
    emsr2d2's Avatar
    emsr2d2 is online now Moderator
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    Re: Correct me please

    Quote Originally Posted by MaryamAbbasi View Post
    Hi,
    Could you please correct these sentences?

    1- The most valuable thing I've ever had was a 90-meter square apartment that I won in a lottery. (Is it possible to use lottery here or is the lottery only used for money?)
    Yes, you can use "lottery" It just means a competition where you buy a ticket or choose numbers and then someone wins.
    The phrase "90-meter square apartment" doesn't work. That sounds like a square apartment which somehow measures 90 meters. It's either a "ninety square meter apartment" or a "ninety meters squared apartment". I'm not sure which one applies to apartment sizes because we don't measure our accommodation in the same way in the UK.

    2- I had a 3-year-old daughter who needed to be looked after 24/7.

    3- One day, I heard about a house lottery taking place in our company.

    4- I registered my name disappointingly cause I could have never imagined that I'd win. (Is the tense correct?)
    Firstly, you didn't register your name "disappointingly". You might have registered it reluctantly (if you didn't really want to) or pessimistically (which fits better).
    For the end of the sentence, I would use "I could never have imagined [that] I would win" or "I never imagined [that] I would win".


    5- It took two years until the building of these apartments had finished.
    It's OK but a little unnatural.
    It took two years for the building of these apartments to be finished.
    These apartments took two years to build.


    6- Can we say "attend" the lottery? (e.g. There were four people attending the lottery.)
    No. People "take part in" or "participate in" a lottery. They might attend a lottery draw, the event where the winner is chosen.

    Thank you in advance.
    Mary
    See above for my corrections and comments in red.
    Remember - correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing make posts much easier to read.

  3. #3
    SoothingDave is offline VIP Member
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    Re: Correct me please

    They might attend a lottery draw
    That would be a "drawing" in AmE.

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