that we in the future- that, in the future, we
most concentrate- must
which particularly is from- delete 'which is'
20 %- 20%
up going- hyphenate
after their retiring- after bretiring
getting older they have also- older, they also have
a financial comfort- good/sound finances?
was on 35%- was 35%
have now dropped- has
over 50- over 50s
spend which they do- spend, which they do
the large generation- the baby boom gerneration
on the 1950s- in
To penetrate- You could penetrate the market, but not the people in my opinion
do the interest depend on weather they are alone or have grandchildren- their interests? Also, this needs some punctuation to separate it
direct to their life situation- appropriate to?
But it isn’t unimportant- 'But' doesn't work here for me
they not are- word order
pictures him learning- preposition missing and wrong word