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  1. #1
    Kofike is offline Newbie
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    Default Please, check my letter

    Dear Mrs Archer,

    I am writing in connection with your advertisement for a buyer for children’s fashions, in Fashion News.
    I am interested in the job, because I am going to move to Italy next year. My son and my daughter are going to start the school in Rome. Recently I am a designer at a hungarian design company, called Dolce Vita. The headmaster of this company is my Italian uncle, so I have a good practice in Italian language. Previously I worked as a teacher, and I had always a good contact with children. I know well the style, that they like.
    I am looking for a job where I can have experience in the other side of design and can develope in trading.
    I would be grateful, if You inform me about the name of the town of region, where the job take place. Before I close my letter I would like to enquire about the salary, and if is there any accomodation provided.
    Yours sincerely

  2. #2
    emsr2d2's Avatar
    emsr2d2 is online now Moderator
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    Default Re: Please, check my letter

    Quote Originally Posted by Kofike View Post
    Dear Mrs Archer,

    I am writing in connection with your advertisement for a buyer for children’s fashions, in Fashion News.
    I am writing regarding the position of "Buyer for Children's Fashions" which was advertised in Fashion News on [date]. I would be very grateful if you could give me some more information about the job - where is the position based, what is the salary and is any accommodation provided?

    I am interested in the job, because I am going to move to Italy next year. My son and my daughter are going to start the school in Rome. Recently I am a designer at a hungarian design company, called Dolce Vita. The headmaster of this company is my Italian uncle, so I have a good practice in Italian language. Previously I worked as a teacher, and I had always a good contact with children. I know well the style, that they like.
    I am currently employed as a designer by Dolce Vita, a Hungarian design company whose managing director is Italian. I speak good Italian and I plan to move to Italy next year. I was previously a teacher and I have two children of my own so I have had lots of contact with young people and a good idea of the styles they like.

    I am looking for a job where I can have experience in the other side of design and can develope in trading.
    I am particularly interested in working on the other side of the fashion design industry and to work within the trade industry.

    I would be grateful, if You inform me about the name of the town of region, where the job take place. Before I close my letter I would like to enquire about the salary, and if is there any accomodation provided.

    I look forward to hearing from you with regard to my queries.

    Yours sincerely
    My suggested paragraphs are in red above.
    Remember - correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing make posts much easier to read.

  3. #3
    Kofike is offline Newbie
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    Default Re: Please, check my letter

    Quote Originally Posted by emsr2d2 View Post
    My suggested paragraphs are in red above.
    Thank You!

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