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  1. #1
    Peachi is offline Newbie
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    Default Final sentences of a cover letter

    Dear Teachers &/or Native speakers,

    I am not sure about grammar and word order. Please could anybody have a look at these two paragraphs, especially the last one. Many thanks in advance.


    As I am Multilingual assistant by profession I would love the opportunity to work in a British company where I can contribute my customer service skills and knowledge about the German market.
    Because of different jobs in the service sector and in the office, I offer you a structured assistant with excellent communication skills keeping the overview in turbulent times and also represent your company international in an adequate way.

  2. #2
    emsr2d2's Avatar
    emsr2d2 is offline Moderator
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    Default Re: Final sentences of a cover letter

    Quote Originally Posted by Peachi View Post
    Dear Teachers &/or Native speakers,

    I am not sure about grammar and word order. Please could anybody have a look at these two paragraphs, especially the last one. Many thanks in advance.


    As I am Multilingual assistant by profession I would love the opportunity to work in a British company where I can contribute my customer service skills and knowledge about the German market.
    Because of different jobs in the service sector and in the office, I offer you a structured assistant with excellent communication skills keeping the overview in turbulent times and also represent your company international in an adequate way.
    The first thing I suggest you change is the word "adequate". It means "barely acceptable", "just about OK". I wouldn't want to employ someone adequate, I want to employ someone amazing, incredible, brilliant, spectacular. I am not suggesting you use any of those words but please don't use "adequate".
    Remember - correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing make posts much easier to read.

  3. #3
    MikeNewYork's Avatar
    MikeNewYork is offline VIP Member
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    Default Re: Final sentences of a cover letter

    Quote Originally Posted by Peachi View Post
    Dear Teachers &/or Native speakers,

    I am not sure about grammar and word order. Please could anybody have a look at these two paragraphs, especially the last one. Many thanks in advance.


    As I am Multilingual assistant by profession, I would love the opportunity to work in a British company where I can contribute my customer service skills and knowledge about the German market.
    Because of my having had different jobs in the service sector and in the office, I offer you a structured assistant with excellent communication skills, keeping the overview in turbulent times and also representing your company internationally in a positive way.
    I agree with emsr about "adequate". I have made a few corrections above.

  4. #4
    billmcd is offline Key Member
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    Default Re: Final sentences of a cover letter

    [QUOTE=Peachi;1003126]Dear Teachers &/or Native speakers,

    I am not sure about grammar and word order. Please could anybody have a look at these two paragraphs, especially the last one. Many thanks in advance.


    As I am a Multilingual assistant by profession and I would love am eager for the opportunity to work in a British company where I can contribute my customer service skills and knowledge about the German market.
    Because of different I have performed a variety of jobs in the service sector and in the office, I am confident that I can offer you a structured skilled assistant with excellent communication skills, keeping the overview while maintaining the objectives of the enterprise especiallyin turbulent times of instability in the global economy and also consistently representing your company internationally in an adequate a professional way manner. [/QUOTE] Suggestions.

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