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  1. #1
    jasonlulu_2000 is offline Senior Member
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    Default give in or give up

    As I had my first child, I promised myself never to be a pushy parent. I was going to be a very patient and understanding mother.
    Five years later my little boy was about to test for his yellow belt in karate. As a five-year-old child, he wasn’t taking itseriously, because it was Mom trying to help him. I found myself yelling and telling him he would never get the belt acting like that. I was trying to teach him his back-flip. He continued to play and I continued to yell. Finally I had made him feel like he couldn’t accomplish anything, just as I promised myself I wouldn’t do.
    Still mad and stubborn I couldn’t 1 . I had to teach him his flip.
    A. give in B. give up
    I think both answers are acceptable. But the answer given is "give in" .
    1. What does a native think of it?

    2. Also what does "just as I promised myself I wouldn’t do" mean in the second paragraph?

    Thanks!

    Jason






  2. #2
    Tdol is offline Editor, UsingEnglish.com
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    Default Re: give in or give up

    1 I think both could fit.

    2 The person had promised himself that he would not make his son feel incapable, yet he still made him feel that way.

  3. #3
    Raymott's Avatar
    Raymott is offline VIP Member
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    Default Re: give in or give up

    Quote Originally Posted by jasonlulu_2000 View Post
    As I had my first child, I promised myself never to be a pushy parent. I was going to be a very patient and understanding mother.
    Five years later my little boy was about to test for his yellow belt in karate. As a five-year-old child, he wasn’t taking itseriously, because it was Mom trying to help him. I found myself yelling and telling him he would never get the belt acting like that. I was trying to teach him his back-flip. He continued to play and I continued to yell. Finally I had made him feel like he couldn’t accomplish anything, just as I promised myself I wouldn’t do.
    Still mad and stubborn I couldn’t 1 . I had to teach him his flip.
    A. give in B. give up
    I think both answers are acceptable. But the answer given is "give in" .
    1. What does a native think of it?

    2. Also what does "just as I promised myself I wouldn’t do" mean in the second paragraph?

    Thanks!

    Jason
    While they're mostly about the same, I'd use "give up" there. You "give up" a struggle. You "give in " to insurmountable difficulties. Since you're not giving the verb an object, they can both be used. You can say, "I couldn't up on him. I couldn't give up on my efforts, since I'd done so much already. I couldn't give in now." It's all the same.

    2. It's irony. You're doing exactly what you promised yourself you wouldn't do - make him feel hopeless.

  4. #4
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    probus is offline Key Member
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    Default Re: give in or give up

    I agree with both of the earlier responses, but I'd like to add that "give in" is the more commonly used phrase when someone submits to the will of others, while "give up" is more common when one is faced with circumstances that cannot be overcome.

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