[General] Language of the world

Status
Not open for further replies.

anniehouston7

New member
Joined
Feb 14, 2014
Member Type
Student or Learner
Native Language
Chinese
Home Country
China
Current Location
China
Hello Everyone here,

I'm a new member here, I've been learning English sice I was in my Junior School, now I wanna practice my Writing skills here, hope everyone can give me some advice and I'll be very appriciated~~~~~here goes the article:


People from different countries speak entirely different languages.. However, it does exists one type of language which connects all the people all around the world without misunderstanding, that magic item is the Music.


It is impossible to live in a world without music, it can not only relieve your stress after work and help yourself calm down, but also turn you on and have passion to reach your dream. An elegantly fluent piano melody is just like a crystal-clear stream of water flowing through your outrageous inner world, irrigating your hearts; on the other side, a tedious life could be on fire with an energetic pop music and let you wave with the rythem of love.


There are many different kinds of music throughout the world. One may argue about the importance of their traditional own music comparing with the international one. In my opinion, they are the same on the scale of music. Because each type is an outcome of many years of music history, it belongs to a nation of their own. We should remember and carry forward our own type, at the same time, show our respect and appreciation to others’.


Traditional music can bring foreigners to a brand-new world, let them start a new adventure which they’ve never had before, while the international music injects a fresh blood to us and let us feel every cell of their years of culture.


Music is a world language for people living under the same sky, we own and share the music together.
 

Raymott

VIP Member
Joined
Jun 29, 2008
Member Type
Academic
Native Language
English
Home Country
Australia
Current Location
Australia
Hello Everyone here,

I'm a new member here. I've been learning English since I was in my Junior School. Now I [STRIKE]wanna[/STRIKE] want to practice my writing skills here. I hope everyone can give me some advice and [STRIKE]I'll[/STRIKE] it will be very appreciated. Here goes the article:
We like everybody to try to write correct English here. ~~~~~ is not English punctuation. 'Wanna' is not correct English. You can't join multiple sentences with commas.

People from different countries speak entirely different languages.. Two dots is not English punctuation. A period consists of one dot.
There's a start. The rest of your paragraph is full of inappropriate commas. You'll need to find legitimate ways of joining sentences, or start a new one.
 

anniehouston7

New member
Joined
Feb 14, 2014
Member Type
Student or Learner
Native Language
Chinese
Home Country
China
Current Location
China
Thank you so much for correcting my English. I'll learn to use punctuations well in the future.
 

Charlie Bernstein

VIP Member
Joined
Jan 28, 2009
Member Type
Other
Native Language
English
Home Country
United States
Current Location
United States
You wrote:

I'm a new member here,
I've been learning English sice I was in my Junior School,
now I wanna practice my Writing skills here,
hope everyone can give me some advice and I'll be very appriciated~~~~~
here goes the article:


1. "Wanna" is fine for Beatles songs, but it's no good for writing standard English. Use "want to."

2. You have five sentences there. Use periods, not commas or dashes.

3. Only capitalize proper nouns (as you did with English) and the first words of sentences. Junior school and writing are neither.

4. "I'll be very appreciated" means we'll appreciate you. We do appreciate you, but I think you meant "I'd appreciate it" or "I'd be very appreciative."
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top