essay for scholarship application, Please help me correct my English.

[moodevil]

Now, I am apply for scholarship, Please help me correct my English.

Research Topic
The Study of Design Criteria of Traditional Thai and Japanese Bamboo Architecture for Design Application in Contemporary Architecture.

Research objective

1. To study design criteria of Traditional Thai and Japanese bamboo architecture.
2. To study joints and details of Traditional Thai and Japanese bamboo architecture.
3. To find out some bamboo mechanical properties that suitable for creating contemporary architecture

4. To find out a design guidelines in contemporary architecture which use bamboo as structure parts or decoration parts

Contribution you can make to improve cooperation and exchange between Japan and your country

Thailand is a country that has their own cultural roots as well as Japan which different from western culture.
For my research topic about bamboo architecture, it is a topic that both Thai and Japanese are interested now.

In fact, in Japan, bamboo was used as a part of traditional Japanese architecture such as fence, window and decorative ornament.
Nowadays, knowledge of bamboo architecture is limited and techniques to build architecture by bamboo cannot be develop, probably because the bamboo was classified as a cheap material.

Just some architects who research how to design with bamboo:
Kuma Kengo, World famous Japanese architect- Great Bamboo Wall house,
Shigeru Ban, architect who get the Pritzker Architecture Prize-Bamboo Pavilion in Houston,
Toki lab -House for Tsunami victims,
Suehiro Lab-House for all.
It can be seen that even though bamboo is a cheap material, but valuable. Similar to Thailand, We have traditional Thai vernacular architecture that made from bamboo such as a farmer house and raft house.

At present, luxury resort that is built by bamboo in Thailand is more and more popular for tourist such as Soneva Kiri Resort, but bamboo knowledge is limited to the local worker. Architect does not know about mechanical properties much. Therefore, to create a great architecture of bamboo, it should be cooperation between countries.

To exchange knowledge between Thai and Japan is better than do it alone. From my experience as an architect on site and architectural designer, I believe that I can overcome any obstacle and complete my valuable research for my country and Japan surely.


Relation between your study and society or what you can contribute to society
- Enriches the vernacular materials by make it suitable for modern construction.
- Can reduce the cost of imported materials, because the material is readily available and grow faster
- Cost of bamboo is affordable and also has a high mechanical properties It will be beneficial to those with low incomes or those who want to build a temporary homes such as disaster victims.
- Promote the use of natural materials as alternative and renewable materials in order to design architecture.

Desired career after graduation explain it in detail
I do a research that I hope will one day help me change the world for the better. After I graduate, In order to further bamboo architecture knowledge along with social development, I believe that I should develop my skill design by build real buildings. I plan to work for any company that is interested to design eco-friendly architecture, architecture for earthquake victims, disaster victims as well as architect for poor people. I believe that bamboo architecture that I will research is suitable for them. Moreover, I would to spread my knowledge that I get from university for any other who is interested about bamboo architecture. I believe that my research is need for them because bamboo is sustainable and very cheap,

Specify the reasons you need a scholarship.
Cost of living in Japan is quite high than I think. I pay everything myself. I’m afraid that I do not have enough money to live in Japan because college materials, cost of study trips, accommodation and daily life expenses are quite expensive. Last semester, when I was a research student, I spent a lot of money buying material such as papers, wood, glue, and form in order to make architectural models. Moreover, about my research topic, I would to research about bamboo architecture. For the last 2 years, in our laboratory, some students research bamboo architecture by design, and then build a real small bamboo pavilion. Some students research it by experiment in material. Scholarship is essential for it. For cost of study trips, study trip is one of the most useful activities in our department. I believe that good architecture student should learn how to design not only in classroom, but also go out and observe real building- how human use those spaces and how atmosphere of spaces affect human. All activities need money to support. For my accommodation and daily life expenses, to live in university dorm, it very cheap but limit only for 6 months. Now I must move to new apartment. Cost for rent a room is higher than university dorm about 4-5 times. I would to have a part time job, but I am afraid it affects my grades. Studying in Japan without scholarship is hard. I hope you will give me a chance to full fill my dream.

 

[tedmc]

[STRIKE]Now, [/STRIKE]I am applying for a scholarship. Please help me correct my English.

Research Topic
The Study of Design Criteria of Traditional Thai and Japanese Bamboo Architecture for Design Application in Contemporary Architecture.

A study of the design (criteria) of traditional Thai and Japanese Bamboo Architecture with a view to applying it to contemporary architectural design.

Research objective

1. To study the design criteria of traditional Thai and Japanese bamboo architecture.
2. To study [STRIKE]joints[/STRIKE] the assembly and details of traditional Thai and Japanese bamboo architecture.
3. To [STRIKE]find out[/STRIKE][STRIKE] some[/STRIKE] study the [STRIKE]bamboo[/STRIKE] [STRIKE]mechanical[/STRIKE] physical properties of bamboo [STRIKE]that are suitable[/STRIKE] and utilizing them for creating contemporary architecture

4. To[STRIKE] find out a[/STRIKE] formulate design guidelines[STRIKE] in [/STRIKE] for contemporary architecture [STRIKE]which use bamboo as structure parts or decoration parts[/STRIKE] using bamboo as a material for the structure, fabric* and decorative elements.

not a teacher

We will deal with the title and objectives first.

*Bamboo is also used as a material for the wall, roof, door, window, floor, etc. which collectively are termed the fabric of a building. You can use 'furnishings' to refer to 'decorative parts'. You would not call a furniture, a decorative part, for example. Decorative parts can also be called ornamentations.

On the relevance of the topic to the two countries, maybe you should mention that bamboo is an indigenous material and grows abundantly in the monsoon climate of both countries.. It has not been widely used as a building material particularly in Thailand. The architects there have been trained based on the western system of construction which deals with the conventional materials such as concrete, steel, stone, timber, etc. but not indigenous materials like bamboo, which is thought to be an inferior, non-permanent material.