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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
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    Default come and correct please.

    Hello Everybody......

    Here is a memo...i want to write it in standard English.....


    Would u please help me?


    Thanks in advance.....





    1- I surprised when I returned from 5 weeks vacation that I receive memorandum was written in the second week of my vacation, regarding that I do not follow up the results and the work up of recipient and donors, even before taking to me verbally to bring it to my attention, without specific patients name or numbers.
    Lately just before my vacation three patients were assigned to me, one patient already I had finished his work up and had leaving kidney donor transplant, the other two patients they finished most of their work up but the transplant is on hold for medical reasons and they have been discussed in the transplant meeting.
    Regarding that the patient’s data is incomplete, in-fact all information is documented in Misys and old chart, if so I would like to know which patient specifically.
    In the clinic we get three kinds of patients:F
    1. Patient coming to start work up.
    2. Patient to review the old chart to know if they attended all their appointments or they need more investigations.
    3. Patients for history and physical assessment to be seen by Nephrologists who covering the clinic either Dr???or Dr ??? I attend with the doctor this exam in case if he needs any information about the case.
    During my vacation I handed over some cases, which need follow up, to my colleague Ahmed the transplant, co-coordinator and she already followed them up with the doctors
    Last edited by Miss Dior; 13-Sep-2006 at 10:35.

  2. #2
    Tdol is offline Editor, UsingEnglish.com
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      • Member Type:
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    Default Re: come and correct please.

    I'll start:
    When I returned from a five-week vacation, I was surprised to receive a memorandum, written in the second week of my vacation, stating that I do not follow up the results and work of recipients and donors. This had not been draw to my attention verbally and did not give specific patients' names or numbers.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2006
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    Default Re: come and correct please.

    Quote Originally Posted by Miss Dior View Post
    Hello Everybody......
    Here is a memo...i want to write it in standard English.....
    Would u please help me?
    Thanks in advance.....
    1- I surprised when I returned from 5 weeks vacation that I receive memorandum was written in the second week of my vacation, regarding that I do not follow up the results and the work up of recipient and donors, even before taking to me verbally to bring it to my attention, without specific patients name or numbers.
    Lately just before my vacation three patients were assigned to me, one patient already I had finished his work up and had leaving kidney donor transplant, the other two patients they finished most of their work up but the transplant is on hold for medical reasons and they have been discussed in the transplant meeting.
    Regarding that the patientís data is incomplete, in-fact all information is documented in Misys and old chart, if so I would like to know which patient specifically.
    In the clinic we get three kinds of patients:F
    1. Patient coming to start work up.
    2. Patient to review the old chart to know if they attended all their appointments or they need more investigations.
    3. Patients for history and physical assessment to be seen by Nephrologists who covering the clinic either Dr???or Dr ??? I attend with the doctor this exam in case if he needs any information about the case.
    During my vacation I handed over some cases, which need follow up, to my colleague Ahmed the transplant, co-coordinator and she already followed them up with the doctors
    Far, far too wordy. I think this captures what needs to be said:


    Upon my return from a five-week vacation, I was surprised to find a memo, written while I was away, indicating that my efforts and follow-up in my work with kidney donors and recipients is deficient. In each patient's file, I specifically left notes regarding the case status. Prior to my vacation, I arranged for Ahmed to take over some of my cases, which, I understand, was done satisfactorily.

    Please provide me with specific details of any problems that may have occurred in my absence. I will see that any and all issues are resolved.

    Thank you.

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