Results 1 to 2 of 2
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    4
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default It would be greatly appreciated..

    If someone can help me with the following assigments... I am currently serving Active Duty Navy on board the USS John C Stennis and have no instructors aboard to help me, and my assignments are due next week. Any help will be GREATLY appreciated.

    1. Comma Splices and Fused Sentences
    The following paragraph contains some sentences that are punctuated incorrectly, some comma splices, and some fused sentences. Correct all the punctuation errors.
    Our country seems to be going through a change in attitudes. Unlike our forefathers, we Americans are now encouraged to get as much as possible as quickly as possible. This attitude is expressed on television advertising also plays on this appeal. Many see a relationship between these current attitudes and gambling on lotteries, it is easy to understand why more and more people are handing their money over to chance fate and luck if what they are looking for is instant gratification. Statistics show this attitude is growing, in the late 80s, state lotteries grew an average of 17.5 percent annually - roughly as fast as the computer industry. High-tech advertising for the lotteries takes attention away from the fact that a player has virtually no chance of winning, advertisements focus instead on the fantasy of what it would be like to win. Surveys conducted by state lotteries show that few players have a clear understanding of how dismal their odds of winning really are, a player has a better chance of being struck by lightning than of winning a lottery.

    2. Consistency/Avoiding Shifts
    The following paragraph has a number of inconsistent shifts in person and number, in verb tenses, in tone, in voice, and in discourse. Rewrite the paragraph so that it avoids any inconsistent shifting.
    High school proms used to be dances where students dressed up in suits and dresses and celebrated their coming graduation, but now you have to spend big bucks for a tuxedo or elegant formal dress. Proms have become big business as formalwear shops ad limousine services offer their services in advertising campaigns. Tuxedo rental shops across the country report that proms, not weddings, account for the major proportion of its business. One local shop owner said that he used to look forward to summer as his busy season because of weddings, but now I make more money in the spring because of high school proms. The typical expenses now include the tuxedo rental, prom tickets, corsage, dinner, and limousine rental. You can easily spend $300 on the dance, and that was just for the basics. Promgoers can spend additional funds for the latest fashions in tuxes, and photos can be bought for $50 or more. Even when the prom is over, there were other expenses. Some kids go away for the whole weekend, often to a resort hotel. So you have to throw in the costs for a hotel, and if parents are along as chaperones, it is necessary to add in the cost of their rooms and meals too. High school graduates insist that this is all necessary as a rite of passage, but the expense is not appreciated by parents who often have to cough up at least part of the funds.

    3. Sentence Clarity
    The following paragraph has some sentences with clarity problems. Revise the paragraph to improve sentence clarity.
    To jot handwritten notes onto an electronic pad may be a new approach to using computers. A special pen that projects a narrow lights beam onto the pad is the way this is done. For computer users who have had to rely on entering data into a computer by means of a keyboard, it is a major step forward in using computers. Not having to type is less distracting to many people who are not skilled typists but whose computer usage is high. It has been the goal of computer developers to rid the computer of keyboards for the last twenty-five years. but there has been insufficient development in the field of character recognition as this is necessary for the elimination of keyboards. Teaching computers to read through optical character recognition is one way to eliminate the keyboard. Recognition of the human voice is another way for computers to cease to rely on keyboard inputting of data. Speech recognition is not advancing as rapidly as some computer developers would like, and it is not likely that the near future will see computers we can converse with. We hardly have not appropiate technology that is this advanced. More promising is the ability of the computer to scan images. Already character recognition machines are being used in offices where pages of printed material are scanned by machines. Also under consideration by computer developers are electronic gloves that could be used by people to point to areas of the screen. There is hardly no limit to what will be coming next in computer development. The doing away of the keyboard will result in saving time and in the elimination of all those typos.

    4. Consistency/Avoiding Shifts
    Commas are used correctly throughout the following paragraph. Explain why the commas in each sentence are necessary. If the sentence does not have any commas write, "No commas."
    (1) At the turn of the centry Howelton was a well-established community of family-operated small farms at the top of Little Sand Mountain in Etowah County, Alabama, between Attalla and Walnut Grove. (2) In this community Thomas Lee and Mollie Benson grew up. (3) He was born in 1888, the son of M.O. and Alive Lee, and Mollie was born to W.J. and Fannie Benson in 1891. (4) Both families were highly respected, hardworking members of the community. (5) Both Thomas and Mollie completed the seven grades available at the community school, which meant they were prepared to take their places in the community school, which meant they were prepared to take their places in the community and to take on the responsibility of marriage and family. (6) Though a few would move to one of the nearby towns to get a job in public works, most young people would at that point become farmers. (7) Having been sweethearts for years, Mollie and Thomas were married on Sunday, January 31, 1909, when he was 21 and she was 18. (8) In that community at that time there were very few big weddings. (9) Usually the couple informed the minister that they wished to be married at the end of the morning service, and they had a simple ceremony with friends and family in the congregation. (10) Thomas and Mollie's wedding, however, was more memorable than most, as the church burned to the ground that afternoon!

  2. #2
    Tdol is offline Editor, UsingEnglish.com
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • English Teacher
      • Native Language:
      • British English
      • Home Country:
      • UK
      • Current Location:
      • Philippines
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Posts
    41,630
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default Re: It would be greatly appreciated..

    Ill give you a clue:
    lacking punctuation:
    Proms have become big business as formalwear shops ad limousine services offer their services in advertising campaigns.
    Incorrect punctuation:
    Many see a relationship between these current attitudes and gambling on lotteries, it is easy to understand why more and more people are handing their money over to chance fate and luck if what they are looking for is instant gratification.

Similar Threads

  1. assistance appreciated
    By UnregisteredVee in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 22-Oct-2006, 19:42
  2. By vs With - Any help appreciated!
    By Sinjin in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 25-Sep-2006, 11:25
  3. Replies: 1
    Last Post: 28-Apr-2005, 06:41

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
Hotchalk