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  1. #11
    Tdol is online now Editor, UsingEnglish.com
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    A quick note before I add some comments. Being a language teacher, I cannot comment on the methodology, but I have asked someone who knows to look at it from that perspective and she'll read it tomorrow.

  2. #12
    Tdol is online now Editor, UsingEnglish.com
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    • Background? The study???
      Purpose? To show that the elimination of childpoverty is economically desirable
      Methodolody? See my prvious post
      Results? That the methods used to calculate the figures used to maintain the status quo are incomplete.
      Conclusion? That the benefits of eliminating cjildpoverty outweigh the costs


    HTH

  3. #13
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    Default main points for an abstract

    What is an abstract?

    An abstract is a condensed version of a longer piece of writing that highlights the major points covered, concisely describes the content and scope of the writing, and reviews the writing's contents in abbreviated form.

    How to write an informative abstract?

    communicate specific information from the report, article, or paper.

    include the purpose, methods, and scope of the report, article, or paper.

    provide the report, article, or paper's results, conclusions, and recommendations.

    length: from a paragraph to a page or two, depending upon the length of the original work being abstracted. Usually informative abstracts are 10% or less of the length of the original piece.

    allow readers to decide whether they want to read the report, article, or paper.



    ·After you've finished rereading the article, paper, or report, write a rough draft without looking back at what you're abstracting.

    Don't merely copy key sentences from the article, paper, or report: you'll put in too much or too little information.

    Don't rely on the way material was phrased in the article, paper, or report: summarize information in a new way.

    1. Make the abstract easy to read.

    a. Use familiar words. If unfamiliar words are necessary, define them.

    b. Avoid jargon.

    c. Use active verbs rather than passive verbs.

    d. Use short sentences, but vary sentence structure so that the abstract doesn't sound choppy.

    e. Use complete sentences. Don't omit articles or other little words in an effort to save space.

    f. Unless the abstract is very short (100-125 words), divide it into several paragraphs.

    2. Be concise.

    a. Rephrase ideas from the original document in your own words to condense the meaning into fewer words than the original used.

    b. Use standard abbreviations.

    c. Give information only once.

    3. Be exact and unambiguous. If the article itself is unclear, use exact quotes from the article in quotation marks.

    4. Use the same tone and emphasis that the original used. however, it is not necessary to follow the author's organization, wording, or even proportions. The more poorly the original article is written, the more changes you will need to make in the abstract.

    5. Organize the information in the way that will be most useful to the reader. Most readers find that a thesis-first abstract is most useful, that is, start with the thesis, conclusion, or findings, then go on to the supporting data or details.

    6. Do not comment on or evaluate the article. An abstract should not be confused with a review.

    adapted from Day, Robert A. How to Write & Publish a Scientific Paper. Cambridge: Cambridge UP, 1995--see pages 29-32.

  4. #14
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    The theme of the article is the elimination of child labor. As even the author of that article admits, in the short term at least, the elimination of child labor would cause more poverty, not less. But that paper is no more than an academic exercise at any rate. What eliminates the necessity for child labor is wealth. It is not the other way around. The author of that paper would pay no price if his proposals worked hardships on others. That is not to say that child labor is a good thing for the child, but it is a good thing for that child's family if that labor means the difference between eating and not eating.

    :)

  5. #15
    Tdol is online now Editor, UsingEnglish.com
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    The methods for calculating figures don't seem to be included.

  6. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by tdol
    The methods for calculating figures don't seem to be included.
    That too.

    :wink:

  7. #17
    bmbsa Guest

    Default Re: Informative Abstract

    Here is my quick try, can you please correct me by adding,modifing or removing

    ==================
    This study mainly compares the costs and the benefits of eliminating child labor. Nowadays, there are 246 million children counted as child laborers worldwide. Thus, they lose their rights for good education and health. The study shows that returns will exceed the costs but not before 2020. The returns are expected to be more than 2 trillion dollars. The costs of investing in educating those children will vary from one country to another. The education they will get, will improve their annual income as a result. The economic benefits will be around US$28 billion. However, the improvement in children health is more important. This study shows how important is the cooperation between the world countries in fighting child labor. One form of this cooperation is to fund the International Programme on the elimination of Child Labor (IPEC).
    ==================

  8. #18
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    Default Re: Informative Abstract

    Quote Originally Posted by bmbsa
    Here is my quick try, can you please correct me by adding,modifing or removing

    ==================
    This study mainly compares the costs and the benefits of eliminating child labor. Nowadays, there are 246 million children counted as child laborers worldwide. Thus, they lose their rights for good education and health. The study shows that returns will exceed the costs but not before 2020. The returns are expected to be more than 2 trillion dollars. The costs of investing in educating those children will vary from one country to another. The education they will get, will improve their annual income as a result. The economic benefits will be around US$28 billion. However, the improvement in children health is more important. This study shows how important is the cooperation between the world countries in fighting child labor. One form of this cooperation is to fund the International Programme on the elimination of Child Labor (IPEC).
    ==================
    Re:
    • Thus, they lose their rights for good education and health.

    Say:
    • Thus, they lose their opportunity to get a good education and they damage their health

    What is the evidence for those assertions? Would the kids be in school if they weren't working?

  9. #19
    Tdol is online now Editor, UsingEnglish.com
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    This study shows how important is the cooperation between the world countries in fighting child labor

    The word order needs changing and I would remove the article before co-operation:

    This study shows how important cooperation between the world countries is in fighting child labor

  10. #20
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    Re:
    • The education they will get, will improve their annual income as a result.

    Say:
    • The education they will get will increase their annual income.

    Or:
    • The education they will get will result in an increase in their annual income.


    Re:
    • The economic benefits will be around US$28 billion. However, the improvement in children health is more important.

    Say:
    • The economic benefits will be around US$28 billion. However, the improvement in the children's health is more important.


    Re:
    • This study shows how important is the cooperation between the world countries in fighting child labor.

    Possibly:
    • This study shows how important cooperation is in the fight to end child labor.


    I don't care for world country, as I don't think world is an adjective that defines country.


    Re:
    • One form of this cooperation is to fund the International Programme on the elimination of Child Labor (IPEC).

    Possibly:
    • One form of this cooperation is the International Programme on the elimination of Child Labor (IPEC).


    :)

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