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    • Join Date: Nov 2006
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    #1

    Please read and correct it.

    Please read and correct my essay, that helps me a lot in sharpening my writing skill. Thank you.
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    FOOD IN MODERN LIFE
    ---
    When the economy of a country develops, food becomes easier to prepare. Unfortunately, there are more and more people try to make and do things faster. They fit in hundreds of works per day that doesn’t leave much time for cooking. So fast food has been very popular and plays an extremely important role in today’s fast pace society. We don’t have to spend hours cooking and cleaning. All you need is pick up a phone and order a pizza for your meal so that it saves plenty of time for you to do different things you want.

    The down side of it is that fast food isn’t good for your health. Most of dishes in the menu are fried; it contains a lot of cholesterol which causes heart-disease, diabetes and other illness. But in a modern life, it is impossible to avoid eating quickly. We should slow down and take more time to enjoy the simplest thing in a human’s life: having a proper meal with family.
    Last edited by kallang; 19-Dec-2006 at 17:48.

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    • Join Date: Nov 2002
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    #2

    Re: Please read and correct it.

    I'll start:
    food becomes easier to repair- what do you mean by 'repair'? It doesn't work- 'repair' is to fix something that is broken or has stopped working


    • Join Date: Nov 2006
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    #3

    Re: Please read and correct it.

    oops, sorry.
    i mean "food becomes easier to prepare"
    thanks


    • Join Date: Nov 2006
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    #4

    Re: Please read and correct it.

    err... do you think it's ok now? please, release some comments here.


    • Join Date: Mar 2006
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    #5

    Re: Please read and correct it.

    FOOD IN MODERN LIFE
    ---
    When the economy of a country develops, food becomes easier to prepare.
    BECOMES EASIER TO PREPARE? CONSIDERING THIS STATEMENT PEOPLE IN CLOSED COUNTRIES TO THE WORLD, LIKE CUBA, WASTE ALL DAY COOKING?
    Unfortunately, there are more and more people tryING to make and do things faster.
    UNFORTUNATELY? IT HAS THE PROS AND CONS...IT HAS ITS ADVANTAGES OF GAINING TIME TO BE SPENT LATER...

    They fit in hundreds of works per day that doesn’t leave much time for cooking. SOMETIMES CAN BE HARD TO COOK BY YOURSELF...BUT THIS IS NOT THE CASE...ONE DAY OR TWO BUT EVERYDAY? EVEN THE SO-BUSIED AMERICANS HAVE TIME TO AT LEAST EAT A DECENT MEAL.

    So fast food has been very popular and plays an extremely important role in today’s fast pace society.

    We don’t have to spend hours cooking and cleaning. (HOW MUCH TIME DO YOU THINK PEOPLE SPEND COOKING, 10 HOURS?)

    All you need is TO pick up a phone and order a pizza for your meal so that it saves plenty of time for you to do different things you want.

    The downside of it is that fast food isn’t good for your health. Most of dishes in the menu are fried; it contains a lot of cholesterol which causes heart-disease, diabetes and other illnessES.
    But in a modern life, it is impossible to avoid eating quickly. (IMPOSSIBLE? HEY MAN WE ALL KNOW PRESENT DAY LIFE IS RUSHED BUT NOT AT THIS POINT..THIS WOULD REPRESENT A DECLINE IN WORLD'S OPERATIONS....THIS CAN ONLY BE ASSOCIATED TO DISORGANIZED PEOPLE..WHO LETS EVERYTHING TO BE DONE IN THE LAST MINUTE..NOT THE CASE AGAIN)

    We should slow down and take more time to enjoy the simplest thing in human’s life: having a proper meal with family.

    KALLANG, THE PROBLEM IS NOT THE GRAMMAR ITSELF BUT THE ARGUMENTS USED TO DEFEND WHAT YOU BELIEVE TO BE RIGHT...REWRITE IT..USE NEW IDEAS...YOU ASSOCIATED THE FOOD TO PRESENT DAY SPEED..OPEN YOUR HORIZONS...


    • Join Date: Nov 2006
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    #6

    Re: Please read and correct it.

    thank you, I'm looking for more information about the topic and then, I'll rewrite it

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