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Thread: short passage

  1. #1
    kohyoongliat is offline Senior Member
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    Default short passage

    This passage is meant for year 2 students. Please edit it for me. Any suggestions to improve it are welcome.

    Last week, Mr Tan, the form teacher, told his class that they would be doing spring-cleaning. The children were very excited.
    Jack and Peter mopped the floor. Jack was so engrossed in cleaning the floor that he did know realise that he had kicked the pail of water. Peter was did not see the puddle of water on the floor behind him. As he stepped backwards while mopping the floor, he slipped and fell. Fortunately, he was not seriously injured.
    Other than this incident, everything went on smoothly. The windows and the whiteboard were cleaned.
    Mr Tan was pleased that all the pupils played their part in cleaning up the classroom. He thanked them.


  2. #2
    Tdol is offline Editor, UsingEnglish.com
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    Default Re: short passage

    doing spring-cleaning- I'd use 'the'
    that he did know realise- did not
    kicked the pail of water- kicked the pail of water over
    went on smoothly- went smoothly

  3. #3
    kohyoongliat is offline Senior Member
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    Default Re: short passage

    Thanks, Tidol, for editing the passage.

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