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  1. #1
    plemplemy is offline Newbie
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    Default I would like it if anyone could check my cover letter.... it is really important

    I have to turn in my cover letter for an erasmus scholarship on monday so i would really appreciate it if anyone could look over it and give me a feedback.
    Hope there aren't so many mistakes :)


    Dear Sir/Madam,

    After having discussed with the person in charge of the International Relations of the university, on the opportunities offered to the students concerning studying abroad and a documentation on Lappeeranta University I decided to fill in an application form. Highly interested, I propose to you to examine my candidature.

    I am currently studying in the 5th semester at the Aachen University of Technology and I am now compliting my Grundstudium (equivalent of Bachelor). I have already decided for a major in Information and Communications Technology and next semester (Summer 2007) I will take the first three (3) compulsory exams of my major : Electro-magnetical Fields , Systems Theory and Electrical Components.

    I have learned that the University of Lappenranta is one of the leading universities in Finland in the Technology branch and has a vibrant and highly regarded Electrical Engineering department. My aim is to deepen my knowledge in the field of Communication Engineering. I have already completed a Laboratory and a Project Work (at the Institute for Wireless Networks –
    Univ.-Prof. Petri Mähönen) where I have learned the basics of different communication technologies and I think the courses the University is offering would meet my academic needs. I am planning on taking the following courses that would complete my curricular area : Active and Robot Vision , Real Time Operating Systems, Applied Optics and Analog Circuit Design.

    Another reason for applying would be my aim to achieve an international and intercultural education (school and highschool in Romania, currently studying in Germany, summer language course in Spain).This semester would offer me the opportunity to discover the Scandinavian way of thinking and living
    by immersing myself in the daily life of the country. I would also enjoy to experience the Finish teaching system with small seminars, discussions and lectures.

    This semester would allow me to broaden my perspective and contribute to my personal development by expanding my knowledge and widening my experience in a variety of academic disciplines. I consider it a challenge and an opportunity to explore and identify ways of improving myself and it certainly will enable me to open my mind. In the same way, this opportunity would be a means to improve my English and to learn another language at the same time.

    Thank you for your attention
    yours faithfully,


  2. #2
    Tdol is offline Editor, UsingEnglish.com
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    Default Re: I would like it if anyone could check my cover letter.... it is really important

    After having discussed with the person in charge of the International Relations of the university, on the opportunities offered to the students concerning studying abroad and a documentation on Lappeeranta University I decided to fill in an application form. Highly interested, I propose to you to examine my candidature.- This paragraph seems a bit long-winded to me. I'd just say 'I am writing to app;ly for the Erasmus Scholarship ...'
    now compliting- completing
    equivalent of Bachelor- equivalent to a Bachelor's degree
    decided for a major- decided to major in
    in the Technology branch - in Technology
    Univ.-Prof- I'd use the full forms
    intercultural- multicultural??
    enjoy to experience- would love to experience/would enjoy experiencing
    Thank you for your attention- Thanking you in advance for your consideration, I look forward to hearing from you
    yours faithfully- Yours

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