Pls help, thanks
Hi, below is my second essay, pls help to correct it.
Why I Still Live In The City?
Even though I am making a living in the biggest city of China, I still wonder why I come and stay here with high pressure from my life, I wonder why I still love to take a course by a course and never feel tired, I wonder why I am intereted in what I created.
Why did I come and stay here? I was born in the quiet countryside and grew up along with the clean rivers and fresh air. After graduating from the middle school, I came to the city and studied in a university. I gradually adapted myself to the city life and love the opportunity which is always much easier to be obtained than it in the countryside. I was obsorbed in the competitions and the feelings when I completed one of approaches. So, after finishing all the courses in the university and getting my first job in the city, I soon got a promotion as my hard working.
City life is really hard for me because of my departure from my birthplace, I have to create so many things to meet the basic requirements of my life, such as buying a house to satify the need of living, working hard to earn much more money, taking a lot course to meet the requirments of my job and even to get a high position with a higher salaries. I always feel that the time is not enough for me, but I do really not think it is boring, contrarily, I am happy to creat it.
So the life in city is both hard and interesting for me because I want to be succeeded in the following way. When I watch what I have done, it always make sense for me, then I stay and will stay in city and face to every problems in my future.
Re: Pls help, thanks
Why I Still Live In The City?- Either remove the question mark or put 'do' in.
why I come and stay- tense
with high pressure from my life- under all this pressure
to take a course by a course- unclear
what I created- what do you mean by this?
Re: Pls help, thanks
Thanks, Tdol, I have edited it, could you pls check it again
Originally Posted by wuwei