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  1. #1
    Karinuska is offline Newbie
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    Default Check my formal list pls:)

    Hi!We have to write formal list-with protest about traffic situation in our town....Please correct it,ths

    Dear Sirs,

    I am writting to protest about traffic situation in our town.Many people have
    problems with public transport.Nevertheless,the company of Slovac bus
    transport is not deal with it.

    First.the Sad says taht they have not got enough money for improving
    transport.However,in my opinion the traffic channels are often delayed and
    we need confirm these traffic chanels mainly in the morning and in the afternoon.

    Despite,that the Sad have not got enough money it is necessary to acquire
    government subsidies.The next problem is that buses are very old,rusty and
    overcrowded.They are not comfortable and conform for disabled persons.

    I think,if we get government subsidies,we will change our public transport.

    I look forward to hearing from you soon.

    Yours faithfully,

  2. #2
    Noego is offline Senior Member
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      • English Teacher
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      • French
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    Default Re: Check my formal list pls:)

    " Dear Sirs,

    I am writting (writing ) to protest about the traffic situation in our town. Many people have problems with public transportation (transport might also be ok but I think transportation sounds better).Nevertheless,the company of Slovac bus transport is not deal with it (is not to be dealt with ).

    First of all.the Sad (what exactly does "Sad" means? Is it the name of the bus company?) says taht (that ) they have not got (don't have ) enough money for improving
    the public transportation .

    However
    (you're not really contradicting your previous idea. If they have no money, you they can't do anything about it. You could use "however" if you thought they were lying to you. For example: "However I know for a fact that their profit increased by 10% this ver year), This being said , in my opinion (no need for that) the traffic channels are often delayed and
    we need confirm these traffic chanels mainly in the morning and in the afternoon. (I don't understand what you mean. Are you saying that there's so many delays that you have to check in the morning and in the afternoon to find out the exact time table for the buses?)

    I'll stop here for now. I'll continue later.

    Despite,that the Sad have not got enough money it is necessary to acquire
    government subsidies.The next problem is that buses are very old,rusty and
    overcrowded.They are not comfortable and conform for disabled persons.

    I think,if we get government subsidies,we will change our public transport.

    I look forward to hearing from you soon.

    Yours faithfully,"

  3. #3
    Noego is offline Senior Member
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      • English Teacher
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      • French
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      • Canada
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      • Canada
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    Default Re: Check my formal list pls:)

    Ok here's how I would say the second part:

    "Another constraint is that the buses are not only old and rusted, but also overcrowded and unsuitable for disabled people. (To be honest I don't think rust is really a valid argument here but it's your letter. I also omitted that the buses are not comfortable. I think that's pretty much obvious by the description you give of them).

    I firmly believe that governmental subsidies would facilitate the rectification of this troublesome situation.

    I look forward from hearing to hearing from you soon.

    Yours faithfully."

    I hope this helps. I also hope you manage to get some money from the government. According to your descriptions, the public transportation really sucks in your town.

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