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  1. #1
    esophea is offline Member
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    Angry help edit my paragraph please

    Oversea study has several advantages and disadvantages. At first I describe about advantages of oversea study. When we study abroad, we can practice a lot of skills like speaking, listening and other skills. It is a good point to improve your foreign languages. For example, when you go to study USA or England, you can practice your English study, and we can speak with native speaker or can receive a right stress for any words. Other point, we have confident for study and living alone. It means that you should take care yourself because you are not continuing to live with your parents. You will study alone because when you go to new place or new country, you havenít closed friends. Furthermore, we can know different culture because we meet a lot of foreign friends that came from different countries. On the other hand, when we study abroad, we spent a lot of money. If we get this money to study our own country, we will save a lot of money because school or university fee is cheaper than abroad university fee. In addition, we are difficult to get in touch with family. For instance, when we study at the own country, we can meet our parents every time after we came back from school or university. Other reason is that we are hard to adapt to a new environment such as weather, living or culture, etc. For example, when you live at your own country like Asia, the weather is enough hot and wet, but when we stay abroad like USA, it is very hot and very cold. In the first time, you are difficult to live at the new place because you can not know all the places that you want to go. Especially, we are difficult to relate with someone because you do not know how to communication with other foreign people. Depending on all these points, we can say that studying abroad have good points and bad points.

  2. #2
    bianca is offline Senior Member
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    Default Re: help edit my paragraph please

    Hi there
    here come some suggestions as to how you could re-write your essay. I gave it a personal touch, though, by avoiding padding, using hinge words for coherence and formatting the text./bianca

    Oversea studies have several advantages and disadvantages. At first, I will start by describing the advantages. When we study abroad, we can practice a great many skills such as speaking, listening and so on. It is a good starting point to improve one's foreign languages. For example, when one goes to study in the USA or in England, one can practice speaking English with native speakers and can therefore receive the right accent for any words.

    Furthermore, being exposed to the language in a natural way helps boost one's self-confidence and start a life on one's own, away from family and friends and amidst English-speaking people.Not to mention that this entails a better familiarity with and knowledge of other cultures, by making new acquaintances and friends.

    On the other hand, studying abroad has its inconveniences as well. One of them would be having to spend a lot of money. If we get this money to study in our own country, we will save a lot of money because school or university fee is cheaper there than abroad. One other inconvenience is the difficulty of getting in touch with family. For instance, when we study in our own country, we can meet our parents every time we come back from school or university. Third, adjusting to a new environment such as weather, living or culture, to say the least, may pose serious obstacles. For example, when you live in your own country like Asia, you are used to its weather all right, but aclimatizing to weather conditions with temperature extremes in foreign countries such as the USA may be tough. Last, living in a totally new place may also be confusing to begin with, because you don't know all the places that you want to go to. Particularly difficult is relating to and communicating with complete strangers.

    Having said all this, one can argue that studying abroad is both a struggle and an invigorating experience.
    Last edited by bianca; 05-Jun-2007 at 04:33.

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