Intro (about,of) myself in an interview[Personal introduction for an interview]
I [come] from India. I m a post graduate in Business administration. Before that I [got a (bachelor's /master's /what have you) degree] in commerce.
I have been working in [the] accounts and administration fields(this is why you need "the", "the ... fields") since I completed my studies on the year[in] 2001.
This is my second visit here. In my first visit(really, either visit or trip is fine), I had come[came] with my friend and his family. My friend's father gave me that visa[helped me to get a visa at that time(?)]. That[It] was a travel visa that [was] only valid [for] two months and cannot be extendable[could not be extended]. This time I came with a company visit[visitation(?)] visa that can be extendable for another [one more] month.
It became[has been] 9 days since I came here. This time only I search a job here[I have spent all my time searching/looking for a job here]
At present I m staying in my friend room[with a friend] in ……. . I will stay here once my job (gets) confirmed[I successfully get a job/become employed].
Something about more personal[Additional personal information]
My father is dead[has passed away("dead" is abrubt, and a little crude)]. I am living[I live] with my mother and my two brothers. [My] elder brother works in a company here. [And my] younger is in India. He is having[owns/runs] his own business.
Remove words in red, replace the information in red brckets (not parentheses) hope this is in time to be useful.
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