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  1. #1
    hmong04 Guest

    Default Teachers, may you please correct my essay.

    I just need you to read over my essay, and see if I made any errors. Thanks.

    No matter where you live, you’re bound to see a homeless person walking to get to their destination; whether it [the destination] is under a tree to get away from the sweltering heat, or in front of a liquor store to wait until a customer comes out, so that he [the homeless person] can ask for spare change to buy food, or a drink. In Anna Quindlen’s “Homelessness,” Quindlen explains why some homeless people choose to be home less; while in Barbara Ascher’s “On Compassion,” Ascher explains why citizens of new York City cares for its homeless people. Though Quindlen and Ascher explain different events of the homeless people, one thing they can’t lose sight is that in the end, the homeless people are still homeless.
    Having been blessed with a home, Quindlen questions why homeless people choose not to go to a shelter home. Do they think they will have a better life in a society where fortunate citizens will look down upon them, than inside a shelter home, where people won’t judge you, because everyone who’s in there is in the same boat as you? Yes, and according to Quindlen, “People find it curious that those without homes would rather sleep sitting up on benches or huddled n doorways that go to shelters” (169). Shelter homes are there to keep the homeless people out of harm, give them a roof over their head, give them food to build up their energy, and teach them the necessary tools to get a job. The stubbornness of the homeless people who choose not to live in a shelter home bites them in their bottoms when they stand begging on the street, as we drive by in our new 2004 Mercedes Benz Kompressor. To them [the homeless people], being humiliated in the streets is better than living in a shelter home.
    In “On Compassion,” Ascher explains to us why people in new York City care for its homeless citizens. For instance, as a homeless male stop by a mother with her baby in the carriage, the mother rummages through her purse to give the poor man a dollar. As Ascher says, “Was it fear or compassion that motivated the gift?” (164). Probably both considering the fact that she could’ve feared the male hurting her [the mother] or her child, and considering the fact that she could’ve been fortunate herself to have money and had always been taught to give back to the less fortunate. Ascher also reminisces about the time she ate at a French bread shop. An old man came in and immediately, “The owner of the shop, a moody French woman, emerges from the kitchen with steaming coffee in a Styrofoam cup, and a small paper bag of . . . of what? . . .” (164). Is it that the owner knows that he comes to her shop, and so she is ready to give him his usual order? Or is it because she has compassion in her heart, and does what she does? New Yorkers actually care for these homeless people even f they don’t admit it. If they didn’t care, they wouldn’t have offered money, a drink, or food in the first place.
    After all that has been said and done, Quindlen and Ascher share one view, which is that homeless people are still homeless. Everywhere you look, there’s bound to be a homeless person begging for something you have and they don’t. They will continue to do that because they know that if one person gives them what they want, probably the next person will do the same. Ascher compares homelessness to Greek tragedy, stating, “This play doesn’t end --- and the players can’t go home” (165). She implies that the homeless people will continue to live as they do: homeless. Being homeless doesn’t end for them, and not having a place to call your own, such as home, ends. As Quindlen says, “They are not the homeless. They are people who have no homes” (165). As a homeless person, you can’t go home after working that 9 to 5 shift, you can’t go home to sleep in your own bed, and you can’t go home to get away from the hustle and bustle of life because you don’t have a home to go to.
    Despite their interest in writing about how the homeless people live their lives, Quindlen and Ascher have a different view on the poor. Quindlen talks about how the homeless choose to be homeless, and believes they are in denial because they think they are in a better situation than living in a shelter. While on the other hand, Ascher takes it one step further and discusses her recollection of the homeless begging for money, drink, and food. The homeless may ask for our help, while some don’t, but in the end, they are still homeless.

  2. #2
    Tdol is offline Editor, UsingEnglish.com
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    Default

    Para 1- l5 home less- should be homeless
    l6 New York- capital letter missing

    Para 2 line 5- in- you've written n

    Para 3 l2- should be 'stops'
    l11 -'if' not f

    Para 4- l1 one view, which is that homeless people are still homeless- this doesn't mean very much to me


    Last line- The homeless may ask for our help, while some don’t

    Some homeless may ask for our help, while others don't


  3. #3
    Tdol is offline Editor, UsingEnglish.com
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    Default

    Para 1- l5 home less- should be homeless
    l6 New York- capital letter missing

    Para 2 line 5- in- you've written n

    Para 3 l2- should be 'stops'
    l11 -'if' not f

    Para 4- l1 one view, which is that homeless people are still homeless- this doesn't mean very much to me


    Last line- The homeless may ask for our help, while some don’t

    Some homeless may ask for our help, while others don't


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    Red5 is offline Webmaster, UsingEnglish.com
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