View Poll Results: can u correct my letter

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  1. #1
    Thagsana is offline Newbie
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
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    Post Can you correct my Letter for and grammar mistakes

    A newspaper article has claimed that scientific and technological progress has not always been good for mankind. Write a persuasive letter to a local newspaper, giving your views on this subject

    90, Derby Road,
    Ponders End,
    ENV 4AW
    Enfield
    The editor,
    the morning Post,
    56 A High Street,
    XY4 6AW
    London

    Dear sir,
    May i reply t a nes paper article claiming that scientific and technological progress han't been good for manking,
    Up to a point T do believe that the new scientific technology hasn't been a benefit for mankind.I don't agree that the evolution of nuclear power isn't dangerous but at the same time the countries which are gifted with this boon only need little amount of uranium atoms to produce tonnes of energy. Certainly we could improveits security rather than totally discouraging it .
    In the article there was a comment on the use of internet being a total disaster. I certainly do not agree to this statement. The internet provides loads of services such as e-mail, chatting , video conferencing, e-commerce, education and so on. of course there might be some sort or fraud like interception of the se of credit cards when buying things over the internet, hacking or dangers of viruses which I definitely agree on, but I guess all these features may overcome the drawbacks.
    It the new advancements are to some extent unreliable by all means improve them but don't make the mistake of throwing the baby out with the bath water

    Yours sincerly
    Thagsana

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
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    Default Re: Can you correct my Letter for and grammar mistakes

    90 Derby Road
    Ponders End
    ENFIELD ENV 4AW

    14th December, 2007

    The Editor
    Morning Post
    56a High Street
    LONDON XY4 6AW

    Sir:
    May I respond to your recent newspaper article (Modern Technology: The Modern Plague 12th Dec.), claiming that scientific and technological progress has not been good for mankind.
    (This is a formal letter so it is preferable not to use contractions)

    Up to a point T do believe that the new scientific technology hasn't been a benefit for mankind. I don't agree that the evolution of nuclear power isn't dangerous but

    The article discusses the many valid risks and dangers of this technology; but at the same time the countries which are gifted with this boon only need small amounts of uranium (atoms-omit) to produce immense amounts of electricity. Certainly, we should be improving security with uranium supplies, but not totally forbidding its use.

    Also, there was a comment on the use of the Internet as being a "total disaster".
    ((If the article used this emotional (emotive) language, then place it in quotation marks. If these particular words were not used, then you would need to use less emotive language eg a failure/ predominantly a failure/ a complete failure.))
    I certainly cannot agree with this statement. The Internet provides many useful services such as e-mail, chatting , video conferencing, e-commerce, and education, to name just the most popular. I recognize that there is also fraud as with the interception of credit card details when buying things over the Internet, as well as hacking, and the risk of viruses,

    but I guess all these features may overcome the drawbacks.

    ((( "I guess" is too informal for this letter to the Editor)))

    but the value of the Internet in people's lives is more important than/outweighs the drawbacks.

    If the new advancements are to some extent unreliable by all means let us improve them, but not make the mistake of throwing the baby out with the bath water.

    Yours sincerly


    Thagsana

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