Results 1 to 4 of 4
  1. #1
    gx90t is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Posts
    79
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default Can you correct my letter of application?

    That's the advertisement I have to reply to:

    "We are looking for helpers to organise sports and other activities at our American summer camp for children. You must be 18 or over and able to work for at least 9 weeks, starting June 15. You should also be fit, enthusiastic and responsible. Accomodation, food, pocket money, medical insurance and return travel are all provided."


    My letter of application:

    Dear Sir or Madam,
    I would like to apply for the job, which was advertised in the Daily News on Friday 5 February.

    I'm attending the secondary school but at the moment I've been on holiday for 3 months and I would be available to work for the whole summer.
    I'm an early 18 girl and I have been studying English for 7 years and I speak it well.
    I'm a sociable person and I love children. In fact, in my future I would like to prepare myself in a way that I can work with children.

    It's extremely important in that kind of job be responsible and I can surely say I am. I've always helped my mother with my sisters, when she was busy at work. I learnt from this way of life how the children's behaviour is.
    That's my second year experience. In fact, last year I was employed in a summer camp in Honduras. I really appreciated it and now I would like to still do.
    I love sport, outdoors and indoors ones. For this reason ,I can plan suitable games for children.

    I look forward to hearing from you.

    Yours faithfully,
    gx90t

  2. #2
    gx90t is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Posts
    79
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default Re: Can you correct my letter of application?

    I know that you are busy but I would like to read the answer very quikly!

    if there is any sentence that isn't properly english or there are grammar mistakes or anything else....pleaseeeeee!!!!!!!!correct me!

    thanks!

  3. #3
    Anglika is offline No Longer With Us
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    19,448
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default Re: Can you correct my letter of application?

    Quote Originally Posted by gx90t View Post

    Dear Sir or Madam,
    I would like to apply for the job that was advertised in the Daily News on Friday 5 February for helpers at an American summer camp.

    I am 18 years old and attending secondary school. I would be available to work for the whole summer. I have been studying English for 7 years and I speak it well. Last year I was employed in a summer camp in Honduras and I really enjoyed it. I'm a sociable person and I love children. In fact, in my future I would like to find a career working with children.

    It's extremely important in that kind of job to be responsible and I can surely say I am. I've always helped my mother with my sisters when she was busy at work. I learnt from this about children's behaviour and how to handle them.

    I love sport, both outdoors and indoors. For this reason, I can plan suitable games for children.

    I look forward to hearing from you.

    Yours faithfully,
    gx90t
    .

  4. #4
    gx90t is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Posts
    79
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default Re: Can you correct my letter of application?

    Thank you very much, Anglika!!

    Your suggestions were very helpful for me!=)=)=)

Similar Threads

  1. job application letter
    By Unregistered in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 22-Oct-2009, 18:25
  2. application letter
    By Unregistered in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 25-Nov-2007, 17:09
  3. A letter of application (FCE is coming)
    By XYZ in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 02-Apr-2007, 17:25
  4. Sick application letter
    By asad hussain in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 14-Feb-2007, 10:42
  5. sincerely ask for Application Letter review
    By rockviller in forum CVs, Resumes and Applications
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 07-Feb-2007, 20:57

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •