Results 1 to 5 of 5

Thread: Maiden princess

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    729
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default Maiden princess

    sing for my heart
    cry your eyes out
    and I'll know that you are still there
    under our promised tree

    your pearly eyes
    bare my desires
    your maiden princess
    burns by your fires
    under your insatiable desires
    and above your sacred skies
    Feel for me.. your maiden princess is here for you.


    Are there any mistakes?
    Thanks in advance.

  2. #2
    Anglika is offline No Longer With Us
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    19,448
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default Re: Maiden princess

    I would prefer to see punctuation.

    So far as I can tell there are no glaring errors, and it is expressive.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    729
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default Re: Maiden princess

    YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY
    Thank you Angilka. I finally wrote something without any mistake wow. This day is sacred and special. Wow.
    I didn't get what do you mean here: punctuation but Thanks again.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Posts
    420
    Post Thanks / Like

    Smile Re: Maiden princess

    With punctuation:

    your pearly eyes
    bare my desires,
    your maiden princess
    burns by your fires.
    under your insatiable desires
    and above your sacred skies,
    Feel for me.. your maiden princess is here for you.

    Hope that helps, and unless you want to make writing in small case a trade mark of your own style (as has been done before), you could do with some capital letters at the beginnings of the lines.

    SB

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    729
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default Re: Maiden princess

    ahaaaaaa I got it now. Thank you Shakespeare's brother.

Similar Threads

  1. maiden voyage
    By vil in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 24-Sep-2007, 09:44
  2. 266-daughter/girl
    By matilda in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 36
    Last Post: 21-Feb-2007, 15:03
  3. Lawyer Princess
    By Piak in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: 18-Jan-2007, 18:24
  4. Iron Maiden
    By queenbu in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 24-Sep-2006, 13:35
  5. Had Princess Diana worn a seatbelt
    By Tdol in forum UsingEnglish.com Content
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 28-Mar-2004, 19:50

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •