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  1. #1
    popsie is offline Junior Member
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    Default Story - pls. look through for mistakes, right register

    Emma could not believe what she saw in front of her. There was nothing there! Trevor, her husband, roared in disbelief „ Our car is gone“. It was an old car and the tank had almost run out of petrol. While they were shopping, someone had stolen their car. Trevor called the police. Later, the police officer told him that nobody had seen anything suspicious.

    Trevor and Emma were an elderly married couple. They have been living alone in a small town, near London. And they were preparing for their wedding anniversary at their comfortable house.

    What a big surprise, two days later. Their old car appeared right in front of the house. It was returned washed and vacuumed. The tank was full of petrol. It seemed even better than before. When Emma looked inside, she could see a small envelope on the front left seat. There was a letter from a ‘gentleman’ car robber. The man apologized for any inconvenience regarding the missing car. He explained that he required a car very quickly and he didn’t have any other choice. There were also enclosed two tickets to the theatre on Sunday evening as a big apology.

    They were both surprised and flattered. And then they decided to accept his present The play lasted over three hours indeed. But the performance was outstanding and they enjoyed themselves.

    As soon as they came back, they found that their house had been completely robbed.

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Story - pls. look through for mistakes, right register

    Quote Originally Posted by popsie View Post
    Emma could not believe what she saw in front of her. There was nothing there! Trevor, her husband, roared in disbelief „ Our car is gone“. It was an old car and the tank had almost run out of petrol. While they were shopping, someone had stolen their car. Trevor called the police. Later, the police officer told him that nobody had seen anything suspicious.

    Trevor and Emma were an elderly married couple. They have been living alone in a small town, near London. And they were preparing for their wedding anniversary at their comfortable house.

    What a big surprise, two days later. Their old car appeared right in front of the house. It was returned washed and vacuumed. The tank was full of petrol. It seemed even better than before. When Emma looked inside, she could see a small envelope on the front left seat. There was a letter from a ‘gentleman’ car robber. The man apologized for any inconvenience regarding the missing car. He explained that he required a car very quickly and he didn’t have any other choice. There were also enclosed two tickets to the theatre on Sunday evening as a big apology.

    They were both surprised and flattered. And then they decided to accept his present The play lasted over three hours indeed. But the performance was outstanding and they enjoyed themselves.

    As soon as they came back, they found that their house had been completely robbed.
    You could write it this way:

    "Trevor and Emma are an elderly married couple. They have been living alone in a small town near London."

    or you could write it this way:

    "Trevor and Emma were an elderly couple. They had been living alone in a small town near London."

    Just try and pay more attention to your tense-shifting.
    Last edited by verso; 23-Feb-2008 at 21:28.

  3. #3
    susiedqq is offline Key Member
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    Default Re: Story - pls. look through for mistakes, right register

    If he roared, it would be:

    "Our car is gone!"

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Story - pls. look through for mistakes, right register

    Quote Originally Posted by susiedqq View Post
    If he roared, it would be:

    "Our car is gone!"
    I noticed that as well, yeah.

  5. #5
    popsie is offline Junior Member
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    Default Re: Story - pls. look through for mistakes, right register

    Quote Originally Posted by verso View Post
    You could write it this way:

    "Trevor and Emma are an elderly married couple. They have been living alone in a small town near London."

    or you could write it this way:

    "Trevor and Emma were an elderly couple. They had been living alone in a small town near London."

    Just try and pay more attention to your tense-shifting.
    Thank you very much for your quick replay.

    I have one more question:

    So, if I use

    "Trevor and Emma were an elderly couple. They had been living alone in a small town near London."

    Does it mean that they died, they are not alive now, at time of speaking ??

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Story - pls. look through for mistakes, right register

    Quote Originally Posted by popsie View Post
    Thank you very much for your quick replay.

    I have one more question:

    So, if I use

    "Trevor and Emma were an elderly couple. They had been living alone in a small town near London."

    Does it mean that they died, they are not alive now, at time of speaking ??
    I believe it would suggest that they are no longer an elderly couple, so yes, they have died (or grown younger, and if that's the case then I would like to know how they did it!)

    I would write those three sentences as one sentence, maybe something like this: "Trevor and Emma, an elderly couple living alone in a small town near London, were preparing for their wedding anniversary."

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