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Thread: Short Essay

  1. #1
    FormerW2H is offline Newbie
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    Default Short Essay

    Hey, any help on grammar/punctutation, or ideas to strengthen the paper would be great, thanks :)

    ~~~~~~~~~~

    My Favorite Pet

    It didn’t matter if he chewed through cords, or never managed to obey a single thing that I told him to do. It didn’t even matter that he wasn’t potty trained. He was still the best pet I’ve ever had. His name was Taco and he was my pet ferret. I had him for about three months, at which point, I had to get rid of him due to his bad behavior.

    The first day I saw him my dad decided to buy him for me. During the payment process, I was holding him, and he peed all over my clean white shirt. This didn’t bug me in the least. In fact, I suspected he would do something of that nature when I first got him. It wasn’t until he did it about five more times, then it really got to me. Nevertheless, I still loved him. He always followed me everywhere I went, and he loved to wrestle my hand. For this, I didn’t mind having a pet that always peed on me.

    One time he even managed to chew through my TVs’ power cord, making the TV useless. This really upset me, but I got over it as soon as I found all the chewed up pieces to the cord. They were on my pillow. It was as if he intentionally brought me it. This was probably the most adorable thing ever, and I liked him even more because of it.

    Another thing about Taco which I found hilarious, he sometimes would take food out of his dish and store it in fairly big piles at random locations around the house. Sometimes he would find something he thought to be of some sort of value, such as a twig, or a bouncy ball. He would take and hide and hide it. Unless he saw that I noticed him take it, then he would run like a mad man. Because, he knew I was going to take it from him. At times he would make me chase him for miles whenever he got outside, but I didn’t mind this aside from being worried he might be hit by a car. It was a great workout and new adventure every time, because he took me in a different direction each time.

    It time, my father told me he was too much of a nuisance and we had to get rid of him. I agreed, but it made me really sad to have to let him go. [no conclusion yet]
    Last edited by FormerW2H; 18-Mar-2008 at 20:33. Reason: Correcting errors

  2. #2
    Anglika is offline No Longer With Us
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    Default Re: Short Essay

    Welcome to the forums.

    Quote Originally Posted by FormerW2H View Post
    Hey, any help on grammar/punctutation, or ideas to strengthen the paper would be great, thanks :)

    ~~~~~~~~~~

    My Favorite Pet

    It didn’t matter if he chewed through cords, or never managed to obey a single thing that I told him to do. It didn’t even matter that he wasn’t potty trained [house trained (potty training is for babies)]. He was still the best pet I’ve ever had. His name was Taco and he was my pet ferret. I had him for about three months, at which point I had to get rid of him due to his bad behavior.

    The first day I saw him my dad decided to buy him for me. During the payment process, I was holding him and he peed all over my clean white shirt. This didn’t bug me in the least. In fact, I suspected he would do something of that nature when I first got him. It wasn’t until he did it about five more times that it really got to me. Nevertheless, I still loved him. He always followed me everywhere I went, and he loved to wrestle my hand. For this, I didn’t mind having a pet that always peed on me.

    One time he even managed to chew through my TV's power cord, making the TV useless. This really upset me, but I got over it as soon as I found all the chewed up pieces to the cord. They were on my pillow. It was as if he intentionally brought me it. This was probably the most adorable thing ever, and I liked him even more because of it.

    Another thing about Taco which I found hilarious - he sometimes would take food out of his dish and store it in fairly big piles at random locations around the house. Sometimes he would find something he thought to be of some sort of value, such as a twig or a bouncy ball. He would take and hide and hide it. Unless he saw that I noticed him take it, then he would run like a mad man because he knew I was going to take it from him. At times he would make me chase him for miles whenever he got outside, but I didn’t mind this, aside from being worried he might be hit by a car. It was a great workout and a new adventure every time, because he took me in a different direction each time.

    In time my father told me he was too much of a nuisance and we had to get rid of him. I agreed, but it made me really sad to have to let him go. [no conclusion yet]
    .

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