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  1. #1
    Zoe2008 is offline Key Member
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    Default Business letter - problem with shipment

    You should investigate why there is one carton missing, but not asking to us. Because the goods was loaded from your factory.

  2. #2
    BobK's Avatar
    BobK is offline Harmless drudge
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    Default Re: Please help this easy sentence

    Quote Originally Posted by Zoe2008 View Post
    You should investigate why there is one carton missing, but not asking to us. Because the goods was loaded from your factory.
    'Help this easy sentence' to do what? You wanted to say 'Please help me with/over/about/concerning ....'.

    How about:

    The goods were loaded at your factory. Therefore you should investigate the reason for the absence of one carton, and there is no point asking us about it.
    If you want to sound really threatening, you could say 'it is your duty to investigate...' or 'the onus is on you to investigate...'

    b

  3. #3
    Zoe2008 is offline Key Member
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    Default Re: Please help this easy sentence

    Hi BobK,

    Thank you.

    How about this revision :

    it is your duty to investigate why there is one carton missing, but not asking to us. Because the goods was loaded from your factory.

    Please review again and advice.

    BTW, what is the meaning of onus ??

    Regards
    Zoe

  4. #4
    Soup's Avatar
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    Default Re: Please help this easy sentence

    What about?
    Your factory was responsible for loading the goods, and so if there is a carton missing, it's your duty to investigate this, not ours.

  5. #5
    sarat_106 is offline Key Member
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    Exclamation Re: Please help this easy sentence

    Quote Originally Posted by Zoe2008 View Post
    You should investigate why there is one carton missing without (but not) asking (to) us as (Because) the goods were (was) loaded from your factory.
    Delete words in the brackets

  6. #6
    RonBee's Avatar
    RonBee is offline Moderator
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    Default Re: Please help this easy sentence

    Zoe2008, please give up on "not asking to us". That is not an English phrase. Bob's original suggestion is a good one. (It's amazing that he was able to figure out what was intended.)


  7. #7
    BobK's Avatar
    BobK is offline Harmless drudge
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    Default Re: Please help this easy sentence

    Well thanks Ron , but I prefer Soup's version - it's shorter and clearer.

    And Zoe: I wouldn't use 'onus' if I were you, but here's a link to a dictionary entry: onus: Definition, Synonyms and Much More from Answers.com . One of the reasons for not using it is that many people - even native speakers - aren't familiar with it. I suspect it explains the growing use of 'it's on us to do it' to mean 'it's our duty to do it' - or, to put it another way, 'the onus for doing it is on us'.

  8. #8
    Soup's Avatar
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    Default Re: Please help this easy sentence

    Quote Originally Posted by BobK View Post
    Well thanks Ron , but I prefer Soup's version - it's shorter and clearer.
    And ... my version was based on your version, Bob. Collaboration.

  9. #9
    RonBee's Avatar
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    Default Re: Business letter - problem with shipment

    Okay, but I would prefer:
    Your employees were responsible for loading the goods, and so if there is a carton missing, it's your duty to investigate this, not ours.
    I would prefer not to have the factory do the acting.


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