I am writing a descriptive/narration paper on Ghosts of St. Augustine, Florida. However, I seem to keep having trouble with thesis sentences. I can write them but I just want to make sure I'm on the right track here. I'd be very much obliged if you could help me out. Thank you for taking the time to read this.
This is my introductory paragraph:
Don Pedro Menendez de Aviles, an admiral working for King Phillip II of Spain, arrived in the Timucuan Indian village of Seloy, Florida on the Feast Day of St. Augustine in 1565. The name the town later received was ironically suited since it saw more supernatural history than Gettysburg. My adventure began late last year when I decided to go visit this hidden gem. St. Augustine’s history grasps the criteria needed for a haunted architectural locations, particularly old inns and hotels.
Not sure what you are looking for, UDC-- the appropriateness of the thesis sentence, or its grammatical correctness.
If your paper is going to describe and discuss the main historic buildings (mostly accommodations-- but surely the Lighthouse is included!) in St. Augustine, then it is appropriate.
Linguistically, 'grasps' is wrong; I would suggest something like 'enfolds' or 'incorporates'.
Hope this helps.