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  1. #1
    Dash345 is offline Newbie
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    Default Help correcting letter

    This is a letter to the office of admissions of an university I'm going to. It's an explanation about something on my transcript. Can anybody please correct any mistakes that I made or any suggestions to give?

    Dear Office of Admissions:

    As you may know from looking at the transcript, I have earned a ‘D’ in a school course during the first semester of my fourth year in high school. By your “Conditions of Admissions”, I am not allowed to earn such a grade and I understand the consequence of the possibility of being withdrawn from admission. However, I feel that I should explain why I have obtained the grade that I got.

    From my personal statement in the application, I explained that my grandmother’s death had made a significant impact in my life. I was hoping that my life would turn back normal a couple of weeks into the school year. However, it turned out that my life had not completely turn back to “normal” yet. My grandmother’s death still lied in the hearts of my own family, as well as my extended family. It became a ritual to pray to my grandmother at least a couple of times every week at my grandfather’s place. As a result of taking some of my time to go pray for my grandmother’s well-being each week, I was unable to visit many tutoring sessions offered by my teachers to clarify content in class. I was expecting to be able to visit my AP Biology teacher for help after school but since family gatherings was my first priority, especially for my grandmother, I was not able to go to many of my AP Biology teacher’s sessions. Ultimately, I was not able to understand the content given very well and as such, did poorly than what I expected. In the end result, I was unable to raise my grade enough to get close to the grade necessary given by the conditions of admissions.

    That is my explanation for why I have obtained the grade. I apologize for not being able to follow the conditions fully. I realize that I will possibly get withdrawn from admission, but please consider what I said when making the decision. Thank you for your time in reading this and I hope to hear from you soon.


    Regards,



    Thanks in advance for any help given.

  2. #2
    Anglika is offline No Longer With Us
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    Default Re: Help correcting letter

    Dear Office of Admissions,

    As you will note from looking at the transcript, I have earned a ‘D’ in a school course during the first semester of my fourth year in high school. By your “Conditions of Admissions”, I am not allowed to earn such a grade this grade is unsatisfactory and I understand the consequence is that I may be refused admission. However, I feel that I should explain why I obtained the grade that I got.

    From my personal statement in the application, I explained that my grandmother’s death had made a significant impact in my life. I was hoping that my life would turn back to normal a couple of weeks into the school year. However, it turned out that my life had not completely turned back to “normal” yet. My grandmother’s death still lies in the hearts of my immediate family, as well as my extended family. It became a ritual to pray to my grandmother at least a couple of times every week at my grandfather’s place. As a result of having to give up some of my time to go and pray for my grandmother’s well-being each week, I was unable to visit many tutoring sessions offered by my teachers to clarify content in class. I was expecting to be able to visit my AP Biology teacher for help after school but since family gatherings were my first priority, especially for my grandmother, I was not able to go to many of my AP Biology teacher’s sessions. Ultimately, I was not able to understand the content of the course very well and therefore in the exam did worse than I expected. In the end, I was unable to get close to the grade necessary as indicated in the conditions of admissions.

    That is my explanation for why I obtained such a poor grade. I apologize for not being able to follow the conditions fully. I realize that I will possibly be refused admission, but please consider what I said when making the decision. Thank you for your time in reading this and I hope to hear from you soon.


    Yours faithfully,

  3. #3
    Dash345 is offline Newbie
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    Default Re: Help correcting letter

    Sorry, I did not have internet for a couple of days so I wasn't able to check here. Thank you for the response and corrections.

    But may I also ask about your opinion on the letter? Does it sound good or should there be some modifications?

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