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  1. #1
    charlesdhngo is offline Newbie
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    Personal statement for medical school help

    Hello,

    Anybody is welcome to critique and offer any advice on making this personal statement up to par with medical school admission board. This is a rough, very rough draft of my personal essay. Thank you in advance to all and your help is much appreciated. Thank you.


    Essay

    I remember when mom divorced dad; she was bombarded with heart and liver disease that hindered her from having a secured financial future. With no healthcare and financially insecure, my brothers and I did the best we could to survive and support mom. I am the youngest of three siblings. Both older brothers were finishing college and working part time. As for me, I felt that financially, it was not enough, in addition to no healthcare. At the time, I was in my second year of college pursuing a biology degree. So I decided to postpone my dreams of becoming a doctor, which steams from family tradition, my great grandfather was a medical doctor and his dad was too. So I left to join the army. The army was the quickest and safest route to secure a financial future and superb healthcare for my family. In addition, I wanted to give back to the US the opportunity it gave my parents at the end of the Vietnam War. The army offer numerous career opportunities and bonuses, and required no experience or degrees, but only a good ASVAB score, which I had. I also wanted a career that has less to do with the use of weaponry. This led me to become a healthcare specialist, an unlicensed nurse in the military. The career path took me many places, from the famous BAMC burn unit to Emergency Room of the Army Germany Hospital that supported IRAQ freedom soldiers and their dependents. I have worked with family physician, orthopedic surgeons, and osteopathic phyician. The four years I spent in the Army Medical Corp has reinforce the idea of becoming a physician. But one day stood out among others, it was a routine 13 hour shift in the ER, it was around 2200 hours during the end of independence day weekend, while inserting an iv catheter into the patient’s arm whom was admitted for dehydration, suddenly, I heard a scream from the waiting area, from that point on the department was bombarded with a barrage of patients from cardiac complication to minor lacerations. During this time, the hospital itself was short staffed because most of the doctors left the military to pursue a higher paying civilian job and others went to IRAQ. The ER only had 1 doctor at the time and one civilian nurse and 2 healthcare specialists like myself. I did the best to help but limited to my licenses and scope. It was overwhelming, that day, all our beds were critical. The waiting room was chaos, high rankings officer, as well as, civilian dependents demanded care, but with one doctor, the ER could only do so much. Towards the morning, things calm down quite a bit, the doctor and nursing staff managed to care the most for most patients and sent some minor severity patients away to other ER’s. At the end of my shift, I sat in the locker room, the experience help me realize my true calling. All over the world, there are unattractive places that are lacking physicians, it could be the salary or the area, that deter physicians away and towards more higher pay and affluent areas such as the city. I will be one of those few physicians that will take on this challenge to go against the norm. From that day, I started to take night and online classes needed to apply to medical school and finish my degree. When I wasn’t fulfilling my military obligation during the day, I would catch up on my studies. However, the road in life is never straight, sometimes there are surprises. I fell in love, got married, and help gave birth to a beautiful baby boy, what I thought was a hindrance, turn out to be fuel. Days and nights studying for my prerequistite, my wife was there to cook/clean/reassured and cheered me on. Late nights while studying, seeing my child’s smile as he sleeps made me realize that I need to finish my career, so I can provide a good home with little to no financial hardship that my son can keep on smiling and pursue his goals without any hindrance. My time has come.
    Last edited by RonBee; 21-Jul-2008 at 19:23. Reason: email address removed

  2. #2
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    RonBee is offline Moderator
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    Re: Personal statement for medical school help

    Quote Originally Posted by charlesdhngo View Post



    I remember when Mom divorced Dad; she was plagued with heart and liver disease that hindered her from having a secure financial future. With no healthcare and financially insecure, my brothers and I did the best we could to survive and support mom.
    Make paragraphs.

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