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  1. #1
    knowwhat is offline Junior Member
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    Default Challenging Letter

    Dear all

    Things between my management and I do not go well, and I am writing a letter to critize the management.

    I am seeking for all your professional comment or opinion in regards to grammatic error, fluency, and the professionlism layout of the letter. and please wish me luck that I wont be fired. hhahahaah

    -----------------------------------------------------------------------

    After working for nearly 1/2 year, I have some comment which I want to share with you.

    I believe you would also agree that team spirit and team morale are very important factors for a team's success, and most of the successful Team is characterized by high team spirit and team morale, and low staff turnover rate (around 10%-20%). The recent high staff turnover rate (50%) has been alarming sign from my perspective. Although those resigned staff tendered their resignation base on their own personal reason, I still believe there is something that management have to do to avoid the situation getting any worse, as sudden high staff turnover rate is, more or less, as a reflection of a hidden problem related in operations which includes, management support, motivation, and how the staff being valued, just to name a few.

    Under the current business relationship structure between A and B, we know that some of the decisions are beyond our B's control. We tried to understand and follow it. However, under this type of business relationship structure, I noticed our staff is under extra pressure, and less being valued.

    We understand that our management had little power to influence the decision made by A, but we noticed that the management tried very hard to do everything to mitigate the impact which might fall upon us because of the operation's change. We, at least me, appreciate what you had done to make the change being successful.

    However, from what I have seen is, despite the management have done a lot of thing to support in operation, I found you have put a little time, if not omit, focusing on what we need and motivates us.

    Let me use my recent shift-request as an example to illustrate my point. Due to some personal reason, I need to alter the pattern of my shift. When I start drafting my preference shift, I put 2 things into the consideration. 1st, how to change the shift to accommodate my special need, and 2nd how to change the shift in a way to minimize the operation's impact if not to benefit from the change. Finally, my draft is completed, and submitted for the management approval.

    Unfortunately, the shift change request has been turned down; base on the ground that it is not operational necessity. I was surprised when I heard the new

    I do understand operational necessity is one of the factors to consider in a management decision. However, the way I see it is the management only look at it in only one decision (operational neccessity), but not 2 directions (operational neccessity & staff's need).

    I do hope that our management will start to focus on staff's need, not just those related with our operations, but also their own personal need which can be accommodate by management's capacity in view of improving staff morale, unity, and spirit, and to avoid anything that de-motivating staff, e.g. double-standard measurement on staff, focus too much on budgeting and neglecting staff's need.

    This is just some of my comments. I guess, given the length and the content of this letter, it is unprecedented.

    Best Regards

    Knowwhat

  2. #2
    RonBee's Avatar
    RonBee is offline Moderator
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    Default Re: Challenging Letter

    Say:
    After working here for almost six months, I have some comments I want to share with you.

    I believe you will agree that team spirit and team morale are very important factors for a team's success, and most successful teams are characterized by high team spirit and team morale and low staff turnover rate.

    The recent high staff turnover rate (50%) is an alarming sign from my perspective.

    Although those resigned staff tendered their resignations base on their own personal reasons, I still believe there is something that management could have done to avoid the situation getting any worse, as sudden high staff turnover rate is, more or less, as a reflection of a hidden problem related to operations which includes management support, motivation, and how the staff is valued, just to name a few reasons.

    Under the current business relationship structure between A and B, we know that things are beyond B's control.
    Good luck with finding a new job.

  3. #3
    RonBee's Avatar
    RonBee is offline Moderator
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    Default Re: Challenging Letter

    Quote Originally Posted by knowwhat View Post
    We tried to understand and follow it.
    I can't tell what "it" refers to. You might want to rewrite that sentence or delete it.



  4. #4
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    Default Re: Challenging Letter

    Say:
    However, under this business relationship structure, our staff is under extra pressure and is undervalued.

  5. #5
    RonBee's Avatar
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    Default Re: Challenging Letter

    Say:
    We understand that our management had little power to influence the decision made by A, but we noticed that management tried very hard to do everything to mitigate the impact which might fall upon us because of the operation's change. We appreciate what you have done to make the change a successful one.

  6. #6
    RonBee's Avatar
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    Default Re: Challenging Letter

    Quote Originally Posted by knowwhat View Post
    However, from what I have seen is, despite the management have done a lot of thing to support in operation, I found you have put a little time, if not omit, focusing on what we need and motivates us.
    That sentence seems to say that the writer either doesn't know what he want so say or doesn't know how to say it. (What you mean to say there I can only guess.)

    I suggest that you rewrite the letter taking my suggestions into account.

    (Good luck with finding a new job.)


  7. #7
    knowwhat is offline Junior Member
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    Default Re: Challenging Letter

    Quote Originally Posted by RonBee View Post


    Originally Posted by knowwhat
    However, from what I have seen is, despite the management have done a lot of thing to support in operation, I found you have put a little time, if not omit, focusing on what we need and motivates us.

    That sentence seems to say that the writer either doesn't know what he want so say or doesn't know how to say it. (What you mean to say there I can only guess.)

    I suggest that you rewrite the letter taking my suggestions into account.

    (Good luck with finding a new job.)

    Ronbee, thank for your comment

    May I know which parts are confusing? What I was trying to express was that the management should focus more on our needs and just just the operation's

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Challenging Letter

    Quote Originally Posted by knowwhat View Post
    However, from what I have seen is, despite the management have done a lot of thing to support in operation, I found you have put a little time, if not omit, focusing on what we need and motivates us.

    However, from what I have seen although management has done a lot to improve operations, management has done little to find out what we need and what motivates us.
    What do you think?

  9. #9
    knowwhat is offline Junior Member
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    Default Re: Challenging Letter

    Quote Originally Posted by RonBee View Post
    However, from what I have seen although management has done a lot to improve operations, management has done little to find out what we need and what motivates us.
    What do you think?

    that sounds a lot better.. thanks man

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