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  1. #1
    sergtab is offline Junior Member
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    Are these sentences gramatically correct?

    Nematodes are a common component of all biocenoses, in many cases they can form multiple parasitic complexes. Abundance of plant- parasitic nematodes often leads to severe harvest damage (epiphytotics). The damage from nematodes is varied from 10% to 80%. Most harmful nematodes for crops are gall- forming nematodes (on vegetables), Heterodera (on sugarbeets and soybeans), stem nematodes (on strawberries, raspberries, onions, garlics and potatoes), Bursafelenchus for coniferous plants. Leaf and bud nematodes affect currants, strawberries, raspberries and many other agricultural crops.

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    Re: Are these sentences gramatically correct?

    Nematodes are a common component of all biocenoses,

    They are either common to many biocenoses or a component of all.

    "common' means 'often found' (but not in 'all'); and you then say 'they (are found) in all biocenoses"

    Before proofreading further: is this an Abstract? This will determine whether definite articles are used or not. As it stands, it is written as an Abstract.

  3. #3
    sergtab is offline Junior Member
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    Re: Are these sentences gramatically correct?

    No, it is not an abstract. It is a paragraph from a poster. Please tell me, what should I correct in these sentences? Thank you!

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    Re: Are these sentences gramatically correct?

    Sorry if I keep on about this: do you mean 'poster' as in a poster session at a conference, where, in effect, you are giving an overview, a summary of your research and people go round browsing, looking at each of the displays that interests them?

  5. #5
    sergtab is offline Junior Member
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    Re: Are these sentences gramatically correct?

    Yes, I do. It is a poster for conference. Please tell me, what should I correct in this case?
    I want also to know, what should I correct if this text is a part of scientific article? Thank you!

  6. #6
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    Re: Are these sentences gramatically correct?

    As I understand, the Russian language doesn't use the definite article -'the'. I needed to make sure you were writing in English as in an Abstract, or for a poster session, as opposed to having lapsed into Russian English.
    As an Abstract/Poster:

    Nematodes are a (omission) component of all biocenoses, in many cases forming multiple parasitic complexes.

    'abundance' : a very large quantity of something : "The tropical island boasts an abundance of wildlife." 'abundance' is used in a positive sense, as in 'an abundant harvest'. You mean 'a lot of' but in a noxious/harmful/deleterious way. Also, the next two sentences repeat information: 'they cause damage' and 'the damage they cause is varied...' Combine the two sentences:


    Infestation of plant-parasitic nematodes often leads to severe harvest damage (epiphytotics), ranging from 10 to 80%.

    The next sentence repeats 'nematodes'. The subject of the sentence 'nematodes' comes after 'are' ( "harmful" is the adjective describing nematodes'; and the adverb modifying the adjective - 'most'). The other way around: " Nematodes are most harmful to...".
    At this point, this gives us:
    Most harmful (omission) for crops are gall-forming nematodes (on vegetables), Heterodera (on sugarbeets and soybeans), stem nematodes (on strawberries, raspberries, onions, garlics and potatoes), and Bursafelenchus for coniferous plants. Leaf and bud nematodes affect currants, strawberries, raspberries and many other such agricultural crops.

    Trouble is: the '(on vegetables)'. You know that you are going on to talk about fruit, but the way you have written it, it 'says' -'stop a minute, here I'm just talking about vegetables- something else is coming'. As it stands, '(on vegetables)' seems stuck into the sentence and it stands out oddly. Easy to rectify: (and note the use of the colon I've added to your sentence.)
    In an Abstract/Poster, we can rephrase the sentence as:

    Most harmful (omission) for vegetable crops are gall-forming nematodes: Heterodera (on sugarbeets and soybeans), stem nematodes (on strawberries, raspberries, onions, garlics and potatoes), and Bursafelenchus for coniferous plants. Leaf and bud nematodes affect currants, strawberries, raspberries and many other such agricultural crops.


    'such' : I've added this because you have talked about vegetables, then go on to talk specifically about 'leaf and bud nematodes' affecting fruits. Both are agricultural crops; yet if you say 'and many other agricultural crops', does this mean, 'hang on, by 'other', do you mean leaf and bud nematodes also affect vegetables as well?' Or do you mean, 'and other sorts of fruit'? By including 'such', you are still confining what you are talking about to 'fruit'. If this is not so, then the sentence is not clear.

    That's looking good!
    Last edited by David L.; 29-Aug-2008 at 08:46.

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