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  1. #1
    banderas's Avatar
    banderas is offline Key Member
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    Default Personal Profile

    Dear Friends, do you think you could improve my profile grammaticaly and stylistically? Here it is:

    I used to work as an English and German teacher back in Poland. I have been in hospitality industry in the UK and now I am about to change my career and go into IT profession. I am a dynamic and self-motivated graduate with IT and customer service related skills suited to any business environment. I gained outstanding communication skills having worked as a receptionist in five star hotels in London. Excellent organisation, hard working attitude, constant will to learn and my personality allow me to adapt easily and thrive in any work setting.

    How does it sound? Do you think I should stick to the template I used to compose it or just be original and write it my own way? Thanks for any suggestions!
    Banderas

  2. #2
    banderas's Avatar
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    Default Re: Personal Profile

    Anyone, please?

  3. #3
    Clark is offline Key Member
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    Default Re: Personal Profile

    Hi, Banderas. I think no job would be worthy of a person possessing such qualities.
    Last edited by Clark; 29-Sep-2008 at 12:10. Reason: article

  4. #4
    Anglika is offline No Longer With Us
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    Default Re: Personal Profile

    Quote Originally Posted by banderas View Post
    Dear Friends, do you think you could improve my profile grammaticaly and stylistically? Here it is:

    I used to work as an English and German teacher back in Poland. I have been in hospitality industry in the UK and now I am about to change my career and go into IT profession into IT/into IT professionally. I am a dynamic and self-motivated graduate with IT and customer service related skills suited to any business environment. I gained outstanding communication skills having worked as a receptionist in five star hotels in London. Excellent organisation, hard working attitude, constant will to learn and my personality allow me to adapt easily and thrive in any work setting.

    How does it sound? Do you think I should stick to the template I used to compose it or just be original and write it my own way? Thanks for any suggestions!
    Banderas
    It would be interesting to see it written in your own way.

  5. #5
    banderas's Avatar
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    Default Re: Personal Profile

    Quote Originally Posted by Clark View Post
    Hi, Banderas. I think no job would be worthy of a person possessing such qualities.
    Hi Clark, maybe but some jobs do need me, so I will start applying

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Personal Profile

    Quote Originally Posted by Anglika View Post
    It would be interesting to see it written in your own way.
    Thank you, Anglika. I will give it a try.

  7. #7
    banderas's Avatar
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    Default Re: Personal Profile

    Quote Originally Posted by Anglika View Post
    It would be interesting to see it written in your own way.
    I used to work as an English and German teacher back in Poland. I have also experienced to work in hospitality industry in the UK but, since I can remember, I have been always passionate about computers. Having joined Joskos company in London, I became Microsoft Certified Professional and then Microsoft Certified Systems Administrator, which helped me to develop my passion and start my career in IT.
    I am a likeable and, at the same time, very reliable person, which makes me suit to any business and customer service environment. After having worked as a receptionist in five star hotels in London I know how to talk with people and how to solve their problems. I love to work hard and have a lot of energy. My constant will to learn and my personality allow me to adapt easily and thrive in any work setting.

    Which version is better, Anglika?

  8. #8
    Anglika is offline No Longer With Us
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    Default Re: Personal Profile

    Quote Originally Posted by banderas View Post
    I used to work as an English and German teacher back in Poland. I have also experienced work in the hospitality industry in the UK. However, ever since I can remember, I have been passionate about computers. Having joined Joskos, an IT company in London, I became a Microsoft Certified Professional and then a Microsoft Certified Systems Administrator, which helped me to develop my passion and start my career in IT.
    I am a likeable and, at the same time, very reliable person, which makes me suited to//suitable for any business and customer service environment. After having worked as a receptionist in five star hotels in London, I know how to talk with people and how to solve their problems. I love to work hard and have a lot of energy. My constant will to learn and my personality allow me to adapt easily and thrive in any work setting.

    Which version is better, Anglika?
    Yours gives a much better idea of you as a person and would, I think, be more likely to catch the attention of a potential employer.

    I have given it a little smoothing.

  9. #9
    banderas's Avatar
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    Default Re: Personal Profile

    Quote Originally Posted by Anglika View Post
    Yours gives a much better idea of you as a person and would, I think, be more likely to catch the attention of a potential employer.

    I have given it a little smoothing.
    Thank you, Anglika! I am going to follow your advice.

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