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  1. #1
    thedaffodils's Avatar
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    Lightbulb [Fable] Every Pot Has Its Day

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    Hello! This is my English practice. It's based on a Chinese fable. I hope someone could proofread it for me or advise on my writing. Many thanks!


    Every Pot Has Its Day


    There were two pots in a king’s kitchen; One was made of china, the other made of iron. The Pot-of-iron looked down upon the Pot-of-china, and often ridiculed him.

    “Dare you duel with me, Pot-of-china?”, Pot-of-iron asked haughtily.

    “No, my dear Pot-of-iron.”, Pot-of-china answered modestly.

    “I know you dare not. Wimp!”, Pot-of-iron thumbed his nose.

    “I indeed dare not fight with you, yet I ain’t a wimp.”, Pot-of-china said calmly, “Our responsibilities are to contain things but not colliding with each other. When come to our functions, methinks I am nothing less than you. And…”

    “Shut up!”, Pot-of-iron snapped, “You can’t hold a candle with me! Look, you will fall into pieces soon! And I’m here forever and worry about nothing.”

    “Why do you get at me?”, Pot-of-china said, “Can’t we become friends?”

    “I feel ashamed of staying with you. What are you? ”, Pot-of-iron shrieked, “Let’s wait and see, you’ll in rags sooner or later.”

    Pot-of-china didn’t retort but kept in silence.

    Day after day, year after year, time goes forward without stop. Many things have changed in the world. The dynasty was finished and the palace collapsed. The two pots were deserted in the ruins and they were covered with dirts for countless centuries.

    One day, a group of archeologists came to the ruins and happened to discovered Pot-of-china after digging it out from the deep earth.

    “Whee! I found a china pot!”, a man cried surprisingly with a pleasure.

    “Oh, really! A china pot.”, the other people acclaimed.

    They made the china pot as clean as a whistle. Time didn’t spoil the beauty of Pot- of -china. It looked as perfect as it had been while staying in the king’s kitchen.

    “How beautiful it is!”, a man said, “Watch out, don’t break it. It’s an invaluable antique.”

    “Thank you, Sir!”, Pot-of-china responded excitedly, “Could you save my companion Pot-of-iron out? He aslo has been strapped under the earh for ages."

    The archeologists set out to find the iron pot. They left no stone unturned but found nothing except for some highly rusty iron pieces. The iron pot must have been oxidised and worn away.

    In conclusion, it ill behove for the one to compare his advantage to another people’s disvantage. As the old saying -every dog has its day, I would say every pot also has its day.
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    Last edited by thedaffodils; 19-Oct-2008 at 17:48.

  2. #2
    jlinger is offline Senior Member
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    Default Re: [Fable] Every Pot Has Its Day

    Quote Originally Posted by thedaffodils View Post
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    Every Pot Has Its Day


    There were two pots in a king’s kitchen; One was made of china, the other made of iron. The Pot-of-iron looked down upon the Pot-of-china, and often ridiculed him.

    “Dare you duel with me, Pot-of-china?”, Pot-of-iron asked haughtily.

    “No, my dear Pot-of-iron,” [watch out for double punctuation with quotations; if the quoted punctuation is normally a period, replace it with a comma, then close the quote; do not add further punctuation.] Pot-of-china answered modestly.

    “I know you dare not. Wimp!” [if the enclosed punctuation is a question or exclamation mark, retain it, but do not add further punctuation outside the quotation marks.] Pot-of-iron thumbed his nose.

    “I indeed dare not fight with you, yet I ain’t [nonstandard use, but it is within a quotation so I won't change it. I don't speak Pot] a wimp”, [as noted] Pot-of-china said calmly, “Our responsibilities are to contain things but not colliding with [a parallel construction would suggest but not to collide with...] each other. When it comes to our functions, methinks I am nothing less than you. And…. [an ellipsis has three points and it refers to something left out; you sill require punctuation after the three points. Hence: a fourth point/period. It might have been more effective to use a long dash -- and no period, to show simply interruption. The ellispsis implies a pause, a dropping of the voice; the long dash would show an interruption better, I believe.]

    “Shut up!” [as noted above] Pot-of-iron snapped. [you had a comma there, yet your sentence was concluded; use a period] “You can’t hold a candle to me! Look, you will fall into pieces soon! And I’m here forever and worry about nothing.”

    “Why do you get at me?”[as noted above]Pot-of-china said[as noted above] “Can’t we become friends?”

    “I feel ashamed to be staying with you. What are you?”[as noted above]Pot-of-iron shrieked.[as noted above] “Let’s wait and see. [another "comma splice" here; replace with a period and capitalize beginning of next sentence:] You’ll end up / be in rags sooner or later.”

    Pot-of-china didn’t retort but sat in silence.

    Day after day, year after year, time goes forward without stop. Many things have changed in the world. The dynasty was finished and the palace collapsed. The two pots were deserted in the ruins and they were covered with dirt [dirt has no plural] for countless centuries.

    One day, a group of archeologists came to the ruins and happened to discovered Pot-of-china after digging it out from the deep earth.

    “Whee! I found a china pot!” [as noted above] a man cried with a surprised pleasure.

    “Oh, really! A china pot!” [again] the other people chimed in / cried / agreed.

    They made the china pot as clean as a whistle. Time didn’t spoil the beauty of Pot- of -china. It looked as perfect as it had been while staying in the king’s kitchen.

    “How beautiful it is!”[again] a man said. [again]“Watch out, don’t break it. It’s an invaluable antique.”

    “Thank you, Sir!”[again] Pot-of-china responded excitedly. [again] “Could you dig my companion Pot-of-iron out [I changed save...out to dig...out; it could as well have been save...as well]? He also [spelling] has been strapped under the earth[spelling] for ages."

    The archeologists set out to find the iron pot. They left no stone unturned but found nothing except for some very rusty iron pieces. The iron pot must have oxidised and worn away.

    In conclusion, it ill behooves the one to compare his advantage to another person’s disadvantage. [spelling] As the old saying goes, "Every dog has its day." I would say every pot also has its day.
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    Very nice story. I enjoyed reading it! Thanks for sharing.

  3. #3
    thedaffodils's Avatar
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    Default Re: [Fable] Every Pot Has Its Day

    Hi Jlinger,

    I am glad you like the story. Thank you very much for all your corrections and elucidation.

  4. #4
    BobK's Avatar
    BobK is online now Harmless drudge
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    Default Re: [Fable] Every Pot Has Its Day

    Very nice story I kept thinking of Terracotta Army - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia . (Incidentally, the rules about double punctuation are the reverse in Br English - so in the UK your version would be OK.)

    b

  5. #5
    jlinger is offline Senior Member
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    Default Re: [Fable] Every Pot Has Its Day

    "Tell me it isn't so!", he cried.

    "Are you saying that in the UK that comma is REQUIRED?", he asked, comatose.

  6. #6
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    Default Re: [Fable] Every Pot Has Its Day

    Quote Originally Posted by jlinger View Post
    "Tell me it isn't so!", he cried.

    "Are you saying that in the UK that comma is REQUIRED?", he asked, comatose.
    No, sorry - . I misread your correction. I thought everything in black was original. I hope the coma isn't terminal.

    b

  7. #7
    thedaffodils's Avatar
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    Default Re: [Fable] Every Pot Has Its Day

    Quote Originally Posted by BobK View Post
    Very nice story I kept thinking of Terracotta Army - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia .
    b
    Hi BobK,

    Thank you for your comment. Terracotta Army is very great.
    Last edited by thedaffodils; 23-Oct-2008 at 12:38. Reason: grammatical error

  8. #8
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    Default Re: [Fable] Every Pot Has Its Day

    Hello Jlinger,

    [an ellipsis has three points and it refers to something left out; you sill require punctuation after the three points. Hence: a fourth point/period. It might have been more effective to use a long dash -- and no period, to show simply interruption. The ellispsis implies a pause, a dropping of the voice; the long dash would show an interruption better, I believe.]


    #1 Should I still put a period after a long dash in such a case?


    “Shut up!” [as noted above] Pot-of-iron snapped. [you had a comma there, yet your sentence was concluded; use a period] “You can’t hold a candle to me! Look, you will fall into pieces soon! And I’m here forever and worry about nothing.”
    #2 If I change "snapped" to "continued", shall I use a comma or a period?

    eg. "Shut up!" Pot -of-iron continued, "You can't ...."



    Thank you!
    Last edited by thedaffodils; 23-Oct-2008 at 12:46.

  9. #9
    jlinger is offline Senior Member
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    Default Re: [Fable] Every Pot Has Its Day

    No period required following a long dash.

    Continued works, but snapped is snappier.

  10. #10
    thedaffodils's Avatar
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    Default Re: [Fable] Every Pot Has Its Day

    Quote Originally Posted by jlinger View Post
    No period required following a long dash.

    Continued works, but snapped is snappier.
    Hello Jlinger,

    Thank you for your help.

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