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  1. thedaffodils's Avatar
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    #1

    Smile To wear or not wear uniform, that is a question

    Hello, could someone please proofread or comment on the writing of mine? I happened to read an essay by a fellow forum member as the following URL link directs . I am interested in taking a shot.
    http://www.usingenglish.com/forum/ed...-grade-me.html
    I have read the essay of his/her. So unavoidably, I think my opinion or structure would be effected by him/her more or less. I didn’t mean to plagiarize his/her essay if there's any similarity between us. Anyway, this is just only my practice.

    Any comments are greatly appreciated!


    Many companies require their employees to wear a uniform at work. In what jobs do you think should people be required to wear uniforms? What are the disadvantages of wearing uniforms at work?


    To wear or not wear uniform, that is a question


    It has been a controversial issue to decide whether to wear uniforms or not in a company. Many companies require their employees to wear a uniform at work. Some people think it is good to wear uniforms; while the other people hold different opinion about it. I’d like to discuss the pros and cons the issue of wearing the uniform as below:

    Uniforms symbolise certain authorities. I think the people who provide services or security to the public should be require to wear uniforms because the common people need to unmistakably distinguish them from the other people. For example, the public need to distinguish police officers from other people when they run into troubles. And the police uniform clearly tell the public who they are at sight. Without the uniforms, people are easily disoriented. Uniforms also stand for the spirit of team work. It tells that people who need cooperate closely with each other that they are a team. The uniform will encourage people, such as military staff, athletes, to work together greatly.

    However, some people consider that wearing uniforms will let them lose their unique identity or characteristics. And The stereotype of uniform will discourage and suppress people’s creatation and imaginaton. It is not good for the people, such as artists, who need rich imagination, to wear uniforms at work.

    To sum up, I think uniforms has both advantages and disvantages. Terefore, the key for people to choose wear uniforms or not depends on their own jobs respectively.
    Last edited by thedaffodils; 02-Feb-2009 at 21:23.

  2. English-coach's Avatar
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    #2

    Smile Re: To wear or not wear uniform, that is a question

    Many companies require their employees to wear a uniform at work. In what jobs do you think should people be required to wear uniforms? What are the disadvantages of wearing uniforms at work?


    To wear or not wear uniform, that is a question


    It has been a controversial issue to decide whether to wear uniforms or not in a company. Many companies require their employees to wear a uniform at work. Some people think it is good to wear uniforms; while the others people hold different opinion about it. I’d like to discuss the pros and cons of this issue below:

    Uniforms symbolise certain authorities. I think, people who provide services or security to the public should be required to wear uniforms because civilians need to unmistakably distinguish them from others. For example, the public need to distinguish police officers from other people when they run into trouble. And the police uniform clearly tells the public who they are at sight alone. Without uniforms, people are easily disoriented. Uniforms also stand for the spirit of team work. It creates the idea that people need to cooperate closely with each other and that they are a team. The uniform will encourage people, such as military staff and athletes, to work together greatly.

    However, some people believe that wearing uniforms results in loosing their unique identity or characteristics. And the stereotype of a uniform will discourage and suppress people’s creativity and imaginaton. It is not good for the people, such as artists, who need rich imagination, to wear uniforms at work.

    To sum up, I think uniforms have both advantages and disvantages. Therefore, the key for people to choosing to wear a uniform or not depends on the work that people are involved in. [/quote]

    Hello! Great essay. :) Just a couple mistakes and some word choice changes. Good work. What about doctors? Uniforms can be functional as well. Or Garbage collectors. Sometimes uniforms protect people from water, waste or dirt so maybe you could add something about the functionality of some uniforms to your argument.

    Great work.
    Diana
    Free writing lessons for all forms of writing.

  3. thedaffodils's Avatar
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    #3

    Re: To wear or not wear uniform, that is a question

    Quote Originally Posted by English-coach View Post

    Hello! Great essay. :) Just a couple mistakes and some word choice changes. Good work. What about doctors? Uniforms can be functional as well. Or Garbage collectors. Sometimes uniforms protect people from water, waste or dirt so maybe you could add something about the functionality of some uniforms to your argument.

    Great work.
    Diana
    Free writing lessons for all forms of writing.
    Hi Diana,

    Thank you very much for taking time to proofread my essay carefully. And your comment and suggestion are encouraging and helpful.

    It is right that uniforms can be functional, especially for those people who engage in dangerous works, etc. Well, uniforms also create a sense of dignity, such as the uniform of judges, lawyers, priests.

    I did enumerate the doctors' uniform but I deleted that because I will feel nervous before a doctor who is in white gown.

    I don't write essays for any examinations but to improve my writing, thoughts and logic.


    Best regards,

    TD
    Last edited by thedaffodils; 03-Feb-2009 at 16:02.

  4. English-coach's Avatar
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    #4

    Re: To wear or not wear uniform, that is a question

    That is wonderful!! Writing for enjoyment. Great idea. I just joined a blog group called "My English Club" and it seems great for people who just want to write and interact with people. No one really corrects you though...not like here. If you want to be corrected and answer your questions this forum is the best place to be. If you would like to write for fun check out this "blog forum". MyEnglishClub You might find it helpful.

    Speak to you soon...when you write your next personal essay maybe. :)

    All the best,
    Diana
    English Course for Beginners: Real life English

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