Results 1 to 8 of 8
  1. #1
    remas is offline Newbie
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Student or Learner
      • Native Language:
      • Arabic
      • Home Country:
      • Saudi Arabia
      • Current Location:
      • Saudi Arabia
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    31
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default who can edit this paragraph ?

    Hi



    If you please can you help me in editing and reviewing this paragraph








    Since the researcher is teaching English language, and after Previewing the results of tests and asking the opinions of the teachers who are teaching the listening curriculum the researcher proved that the level of the students was low in mastering the skill of listening. The main problem of the research is that the students of 1year in the Department of English Language at the Faculty of Education in (..)* have weaknesses in the productive skills and Writing and oral interaction during the use of conversation and writing, and this is because of the lack of capacity to acquire the skill of listening. The researcher conducted a pilot study andConducted interviews with the students who have confirmed that they suffer from the difficulty in mastering the skill of listening. the weakness in the productive skills led to the decrease in the level of learning as well as in the strategies which deals with the conditions of reading skills.



    *It is a name of a city .





    much obliged

  2. #2
    remas is offline Newbie
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Student or Learner
      • Native Language:
      • Arabic
      • Home Country:
      • Saudi Arabia
      • Current Location:
      • Saudi Arabia
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    31
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default Re: who can edit this paragraph ?

    who can ?

  3. #3
    Bright One is offline Junior Member
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Academic
      • Native Language:
      • Arabic
      • Home Country:
      • Saudi Arabia
      • Current Location:
      • United States
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Posts
    64
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default Re: who can edit this paragraph ?

    Quote Originally Posted by remas View Post

    Since the researcher teaches English language, and after Previewing the results of tests and asking for opinions of the teachers who are teaching the listening curriculum, the researcher proved that the level of the students was low in mastering the skill of listening. The main problem the research found is that the students of 1year in the Department of English Language at the Faculty of Education in (..)* have weaknesses in the productive skills, writing and oral interaction during their conversations and writings, is because of the lack of capacity to acquire the skill. The researcher conducted a pilot study and interviews with the students who have confirmed that they suffer from difficulties in mastering this skill. the weakness in the productive skills led to the decrease in the level of learning as well as in the strategies which deal with the conditions of reading skills.

    Words in red are corrected and some other changes have been made

    I still feel it needs more proofreading but this is all I can do

    NOT A TEACHER

  4. #4
    remas is offline Newbie
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Student or Learner
      • Native Language:
      • Arabic
      • Home Country:
      • Saudi Arabia
      • Current Location:
      • Saudi Arabia
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    31
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default Re: who can edit this paragraph ?

    Quote Originally Posted by Bright One View Post
    Words in red are corrected and some other changes have been made

    I still feel it needs more proofreading but this is all I can do

    NOT A TEACHER
    thanks
    I appreciate your help

  5. #5
    remas is offline Newbie
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Student or Learner
      • Native Language:
      • Arabic
      • Home Country:
      • Saudi Arabia
      • Current Location:
      • Saudi Arabia
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    31
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default Re: who can edit this paragraph ?

    no teacher will help ?

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    5,425
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default Re: who can edit this paragraph ?

    Your paragraph needs a major, major rewrite. It is not the grammar, but the formulation of your ideas as a logical narrative.
    FYI:
    I, for one, seldom reply to 'Guests' who happen to pop their heads into the forum and shoot off a question: if they won't take the time to register, I won't give of my time to bother to reply. You have made some half-hearted gesture, but we are left in the dark as to your mother tongue, and whether we are replying to someone who has difficulty in formulating ideas because of limitations in English language skills, or English-speaking and great difficulty in expressive writing........an issue - the interrelation of language skills - which your paragraph touches upon!

    We are then left with the task of 'writing it for you' rather than feeling we have 'shown you how' for the future.

    You get out of life what you put into it.
    Last edited by David L.; 26-Apr-2009 at 23:58.

  7. #7
    remas is offline Newbie
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Student or Learner
      • Native Language:
      • Arabic
      • Home Country:
      • Saudi Arabia
      • Current Location:
      • Saudi Arabia
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    31
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default Re: who can edit this paragraph ?

    Quote Originally Posted by David L. View Post
    Your paragraph needs a major, major rewrite. It is not the grammar, but the formulation of your ideas as a logical narrative.
    FYI:
    I, for one, seldom reply to 'Guests' who happen to pop their heads into the forum and shoot off a question: if they won't take the time to register, I won't give of my time to bother to reply. You have made some half-hearted gesture, but we are left in the dark as to your mother tongue, and whether we are replying to someone who has difficulty in formulating ideas because of limitations in English language skills, or English-speaking and great difficulty in expressive writing........an issue - the interrelation of language skills - which your paragraph touches upon!

    We are then left with the task of 'writing it for you' rather than feeling we have 'shown you how' for the future.

    You get out of life what you put into it.
    thanks for your advice
    but, please help me how I can improve my language ?
    I register here to learn and my mother language is Arabic
    I do my best to be good in English and this is the result

  8. #8
    Bright One is offline Junior Member
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Academic
      • Native Language:
      • Arabic
      • Home Country:
      • Saudi Arabia
      • Current Location:
      • United States
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Posts
    64
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default Re: who can edit this paragraph ?

    Quote Originally Posted by remas View Post
    thanks for your advice
    but, please help me how I can improve my language ?
    I register here to learn and my mother language is Arabic
    I do my best to be good in English and this is the result

    Sorry for intruding but if I may advise you!

    You should read English a lot and when you write English, write it in an English way not an Arabic way!

    You should develop a new way of thinking, two separated ways will be there; the Arabic thinking and the English one, just like you know the Arabic alphabet and the English alphabet

    When you write just forget Arabic and switch to English

    This skill will come only by reading and listening a lot to native speakers
    ٍ

Similar Threads

  1. Could you please edit this paragraph?
    By Mohammed Abu Risha in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 06-Oct-2008, 12:29
  2. Edit my paragraph plz
    By sadness in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 27-Apr-2008, 03:28
  3. Urgently edit my paragraph
    By esophea in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 15-May-2007, 02:11
  4. Plz help edit my paragraph
    By esophea in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 14-May-2007, 07:57
  5. Okay, now please edit this small paragraph
    By NewHope in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 26-Aug-2004, 00:56

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •