You don't call a researcher by his first name.
You've made a fair few mistakes with subject-verb agreement, possessives, a few spelling mistakes.
This whole area is bedeviled by the "causation" problem. You say "on average depression increased 1 percent for every hour a person is online per week". This could reflect that for each incremental 1 percent that a person becomes more depressed, they spend an extra hour online per week. Did Stoll mention this problem? You should mention whether Stoll addressed it or not.