Is my essay good?

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cookiemonster:O

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Hey everyone, I am 16 in grade 10. Can you please read my essay and tell me if it is good, mabe give me a level that you think I may get on it. This is very important, it is a large project.

Pearl Hunters in Mexico
 
 
The book The Pearl was a story about a young man who was a pearl hunter near La Paz, a city in Mexico. He was living with his small family, dwelling a weathered hut in a small village stricken with the unfortunate poverty that so many families in Mexico have to endure. His name was Kino and he was mistreated by the more wealthy people in the city of La Paz because of his inability to acquire a suitable amount of money for his family. Kino was strongly looked down upon. There are so many people in Mexico who are mistreated and looked down upon solely based on their income and the pearl hunters quite possibly may be the most judged upon of all.


Most, if not all of the pearl hunters in Mexico work for an unbelievable number of hours for extremely low wages. The average wage of a poor Mexican worker is between $2.00 -$4.25 (around 46 Pecos) a day. A payment of that is not even enough to purchase clothing for a small family. The pearl hunters generally have to dive down to retrieve the Pearl Oysters, or they will catch them using nets. They then crack open the oysters one by one until they find a pearl of value imbedded in the Pearl Oyster’s delicate tissue. A worker can look all day long and only find a select few seed pearls, but occasionally there is a magnificent gleaming gem found. The oysters can be quite difficult to open up, and the workers are equipped with inadequate tools which would most often result in injury. Additionally, the divers can contract other health problems due to the job. Karipearls states when the water is very cold, the pearl divers in Mexico come up frequently to restore their numbed circulation by vigorous rubbing. The occupation is especially conducive to rheumatism, and paralysis is more or less general, due, not only to the compressed atmosphere, but to the abrupt changes of temperature. The work is very debilitating, with particular effect on the nerves, and partial deafness is common. It is important that the diver be careful about overeating before descending, as heavy foods, and meats especially, make respiration difficult; therefore, breakfast consists of little more than bread and coffee. This job is empathetically strenuous physical labor and violates the labor laws of Canada and America.

The majority of Mexico’s pearl hunters inhabit very poor villages or towns like the one that Kino and his family occupied. These places of living are known as the slums of Mexico. The people living there are low class citizens who tend to be jobless or working unimaginably labor intensive jobs for little money in return. Kino and his family fall into this category as well. Mexico Child Link states that official statistics are unreliable as it is officially claimed that unemployment is only 2%-3%. A more realistic employment estimate would be 40% unemployed or underemployed. After the 1994–1995 economic crisis, probably the most severe in the country's history, 50% of the population fell into poverty. But, unfortunately these families cannot escape their terrible lifestyle. Many families live in total poverty and children are compelled to work in order to supplement the family income.

In the book, Kino’s son was very ill and needed immediate medical attention, but due to Kino’s lack of funds the child was denied care. Mexico, unlike Canada, does not accommodate free emergency health care. It is only administered to people who can afford it. This same scenario happens to occur to so many other Mexicans because people do not desire to help others if they are not getting paid for their services. The village habitants are virtually disregarded and ignored because the people of greater wealth are most commonly not interested in aiding the needy and fortuneless humanity. Furthermore, there are so many individuals in the same situation as Kino and his family that it would be highly unattainable to provide all of the citizens with a good paying income and a substantial education for them and their families. J. O'Rourke once said "You can't get rid of poverty by giving people money.” Mabe that’s what they are thinking.

In cessation, as previously stated, Kino from the story is almost a stereotype of the common impoverished man living in a country which seems to be against him. There are millions of oyster hunters all around the world and whilst some do get lucky enough to experience the marvelous discovery of a very profitable and valuable pearl, many do not get that opportunity and continue to exist in the hardship of poverty.
 

Smithbrokes

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This is an excellent effort and informative work. I like the way you start and then conclude your thoughts. Thanks for this information .I really appreciate your work, keep it up.
 
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