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  1. I

    gap between rich and poor

    Hi, everyone. I think my text is error free but not very idiomatic. Please make it idiomatic. Rich people can afford to use advanced technology to create more wealth. Manual workers, in comparison, are being replaced by automation. For example, while Amazon founder Jeff Bezos is getting richer...
  2. I

    promote healthier eating choices

    Hi, people. I want to say that taxation on sugary products can encourage people to choose healthier food. I don't want to use 'encourage' because I've already used it. Does 'promote' work? Taxation on sugary drinks promotes healthier eating choices.
  3. I

    Excess sugar is added to processed foods

    Original: Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. My rewrites: Excess sugar is added to processed foods and drinks by their manufacturers and this leads to /contributes to many health issues. Hi, everyone. The original uses the...
  4. I

    gained from/resulted from/resulting from

    Hi, everyone. Please check the picture I attached. I'm describing the sixth stage. Should I use 'gained from', 'resulted from' or 'resulting from'? The clean small pieces gained from/resulted from/resulting from the last stage are then poured into a machine where they are turned into plastic...
  5. I

    driverless cars help businesses save money

    Hi, everyone. By 'human labor', I mean 'drivers'. I mean businesses don't need to spend money hiring drivers anymore. Is 'human labor' correct? Also, do you think the bold part is very wordy? Using driverless cars creates a great advantage for businesses because they can devote the money they...
  6. I

    self-driving cars

    Hi, everyone. I'm especially not sure about the bold parts. Please help. Self-driving cars will help businesses reduce operating costs. This is because with these cars, they/businesses don’t need to hire drivers to deliver their products or services to their customers anymore.
  7. I

    employing/using them

    Hi, everyone. Does either 'employing' or 'using' work? I believe the advantage of driverless cars far outweighs the disadvantage because businesses can cut costs by employing/using them.
  8. I

    What a company sells/what products a company sells

    Hi, everyone. Are they both correct? Which version is better? 1. No matter what a company sells, there are alway hundreds if not thousands of similar products on the market that consumers can choose from. 2. No matter what products a company sells, there are alway hundreds if not thousands of...
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    ones of the many

    Hi, everyone. I only heard 'one of the many'. But here I have to use 'ones' to refer to the products. Is 'ones' correct? If the company does not let consumers know in its marketing that its products are novel in some way, its products would be just ones of the many out there instead of the...
  10. I

    Amazon Halo

    Hi, everyone. Please correct this text written by me. I feel the red part is very wordy. With all? digital devices at their fingertips, people nowadays want to limit their screen time more than they wanted a decade ago. Noticing this change, Amazon has launched a screenless fitness band called...
  11. I

    be moved near the entrance

    Hi, everyone. I feel that the red part is wrong. How can I say it correctly? Although the check-in counters will be relocated to make room for the new bag drop, they will still be right before passport control. The cafe, on the other hand, will be moved near/moved close to? the entrance.
  12. I

    once passing them

    Hi, everyone. How can I say the bold part correctly. I used 'them' to refer to the underlined. Is this correct? Now passport control and customs are the only services in the area. However, next year once passing them, there will be a cafe, ATM machines and car hire arriving passengers can use.
  13. I

    next year

    Perhaps, the airport is already being redeveloped. That's why I don't know how to insert 'next year' in my rewrite. Please suggest a way. Original: The plans below show the site of an airport now and how it will look after redevelopment next year. My paraphrase: The plans display how the...
  14. I

    which don't exist now

    Hi, everyone. I know the bold is correct, but I feel it isn't good style. Could you make it better? Once passing the security checkpoints, passengers will see some shops, which don’t exist now. (Please check the picture I attached.)
  15. I

    it can be/it is concentrated into the syrup

    Hi, everyone. I'm describing the fifth step. please help me with the bold parts. The purified juice is boiled in an evaporator to remove water so that it can be/it is? concentrated into the? syrup.
  16. I

    sugar production

    Hi, everyone. I wrote this sentence. I'm especially not sure if 'grow', 'dry' and 'cool' can be used like this or not. The overview: Overall, the production of sugar is a man-made process and contains seven linear processes, beginning with the growing of sugar canes and ending with the drying...
  17. I

    not until 2000 did it reach 100%

    Hi, everyone. Is this inverted sentence correct? I used 'it' to refer to 'ownership'. Is this correct? Nearly a third of households had a vacuum cleaner in 1920. Although ownership then went up considerably, not until 2000 did it reach 100%.
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    this appliance/this type of appliance/refrigerators/it

    Hi, everyone. Please help me with the bold part please. Almost no households were refrigerator owners in 1920. However, this appliance/this type of appliance/refrigerators/it showed the greatest increase in ownership, and by 1980 there was already a refrigerator in every household.
  19. I

    depicting lives consumers want to live and people consumers want to become

    Hi, everyone. Is 'depict' the right verb here? Do the two definite articles necessary? I repeated 'consumers' because I think if I use 'them', it would be unclear. Advertisers are very good at tricking consumers into believing their products can lead them to happiness. They do this by depicting...
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    advertisements VS them

    Hi, everyone. I think the red 'them' is unclear because it could refer to 'sneakers' so I repeated 'advertisements'. But I think the green 'them' clearly refers to the advertisements. Is this correct? Targeted advertising means they will see advertisements promoting those sneakers as long as...